Killian Carson - Blog Posts

"Fell first, fell harder"

FELL FIRST, EXCEPT IT'S YULIAN BEING OBSESSED WITH VAUGHN EVER SINCE HE WAS A KID. It’s him being nine years old and watching Vaughn with wide eyes like he hung the fucking stars. IT'S YULIAN STEALING VAUGHN'S HOODIE WHEN THE MOROZOV'S CAME OVER TO CHICAGO FOR SOME KINDA MAFIA SHIT. It’s him secretly replaying security footage just to catch a glimpse of Vaughn again like a psycho. It’s him smirking like an idiot every time he sends Vaughn one of his boxing videos, knowing he’s annoying the shit out of him, but also knowing it means Vaughn is watching, EVEN IF IT'S WITH DISGUIST, EVEN IF IT'S WITH HATRED.

It’s Yulian starting fights with the Heathens just to make sure his name stays in their mouths long enough to reach Vaughn. It’s him sleeping with Vaughn’s long-time girlfriend because he knows that’s the only way Vaughn will finally, finally snap and see him. IT'S YULIAN LAUGHING LIKE A MANIAC AT THE HEATHENS INITATION WHEN VAUGHN WAS CHOKING HIM WITH HIS CHAIN BECAUSE HE KNOWS HE FINALLY WON. It’s him tracing Vaughn’s rings absentmindedly because they ground him. IT'S HIM CARVING VAUGHN'S INITIALS INTO HIS DESK LIKE AN ONSESSED LOVESTRUCK IDIOT. It’s Yulian knowing he fell first, and not caring—because he always knew Vaughn would fall eventually.

FELL HARDER, EXPECT IT'S VAUGHN MOVING TO A WHOLE OTHER UNIVERSITY IN ANOTHER ASS COUNTRY BECAUSE OF YULIAN, even though Yulian was the reason why he didn't go there in the first place It’s him lying through his teeth about “better programs” when really he just couldn’t fucking stay away anymore. IT'S HIM PHYCIALLY LOSING IT EVERY TIME HE SEES YULIAN TOUCH SOMEONE FOR MORE THAN 5 SECONDS. It’s him going radio silent whenever Yulian’s name is mentioned, just so he doesn’t lose it in front of everyone. IT'S HIM MEMORIZING YULIAN'S STUPID COMPLICATED COFFEE ORDER AND BUYING IT FOR HIM EVERY DAMN DAY ONCE THEY START HOOKING UP. It’s him swearing that everything is just for revenge, and then letting Yulian climb into his bed at 2 AM like nothing happened.

IT'S VAUGHN COUNTING YULIAN'S FRECKLES WHEN HE'S ASLEEP. It’s him pocketing the little dumb drawing Yulian did of him on a napkin and never throwing it away. IT'S HIM LISTENING TO YULIAN'S DRUNKEN VOICEMAILS ON REPEAT BECAUSE HE MISSES YULIAN'S VOICE. It’s him going absolutely fucking feral when Yulian goes missing and dragging half the city into hell trying to find him. IT'S VAUGHN NOT SNOWING WHEN IT HAPPENED, BUT KNOWING FOR A FACT THAT IT'S TOO LATE NOW, because Vaughn fell harder. So much harder.

I can't wait a year 😭😭, I need them biblically.

Y'ALL, I HAVE A PLAYLIST FOR VAUGHN YULIAN. OBVIOUSLYYYYY I'M NOT OBSESSED WITH THEMM 😌. Who would think that 😭.

(Anyone have any other songs that they js associate with V and Yulian??)

Vaughn: Well damn you're so petty

Yulian: You misspelled pretty

Vaughn: You're right

Gareth: I know.

Gareth: About what?

Vaughn: ...

Yulian: I'm not you're problem

Vaughn : Be my problem

Yulian: Guess what I'm supposed to get

Vaughn: On my nerves

OKAYYY SO, AT THE END OF THE BOOK, I WANT VAUGHN TO BE DOWN BAD FOR YULIAN JUST LIKE KIRILL WAS FOR SASHA.😭Like omg, y’know that one scene where Kirill goes, “So she wants to kill me the next time she sees me? By all means, anything for my beautiful wife”?

PLEASEEEE, I NEED RINA TO REPLICATE THAT EXACT ENERGY WITH VAUGHN AND YULIAN.

LIKE MAYBE AT LIKE THE NEAR THE END—Yulian’s threatening to stab Vaughn if he doesn’t leave him alone or something, and Vaughn’s inner thoughts goes

"If he stabs me, I'd thrust the blade in deeper just so that I could be close to him, but that's just me."

LIKE YES. THE WAY I WOULD DIE. I NEED VAUGHN TO HAVE THAT DOWN BAD GENE PASSED FROM KIRILL .

V, babes, ARE YOU SURE YOU’RE GIVING GARETH RELATIONSHIP ADVICE AND NOT JUST TRYING TO CONVINCE YOURSELF THAT BEING FUCK BUDDIES ISN’T THE SAME THING AS DATING??

🕯️🕯️ GUYS TRUST, GARETH KAYDEN WEDDING IN BEAUTIFUL VENOM, WITH VAUGHN BEING GARETH'S BEST MAN AND JETHRO/SIMONE BEING KAYDEN'S BEST MAN/WOMEN. AND ALSO ADD VAUGHNYULIAN CRUMBS INTO THAT PLS🕯️🕯️

(I'm delusional 😭)

VAUGHN TO GARETH ABOUT YULIAN 😂:

AT THIS POINT, IMMA START A PETITION FOR VAUGHN TO BE A BIKER. Bro I can imagine scenes with him as a biker scattered in HTV.

LIKE FOR EXAMPLEEE, YULIAN AND VAUGHN GOING OUT ON A NIGHT DRIVE OR SMTHG, AND YULIAN TEASING THE HELL OUT OF VAUGHN. Like I can so see Yulian "accidentally" put his hands near Vaughn's dick or like "accidentally" let his hands wander into Vaughn's shirt while Vaughn tries so hard not to crash his fucking bike 😂.

OR, LIKE MAYBE A SCENE AT THE END OF HTV, Where Yulian is just like, so sick of Vaughn's ass always denying that he might have feelings for Yulian and THIS IS NOT JUST PHYCIAL. That he breaks up with Vaughn AND LIKE, PULLS A LANDON IN JERLAN FANFICS AND SETS FIRE TO VAUGHN'S BIKE 😭.

Vaughn: I think I'm in love with Yulian

Vaughn: Any thoughts?

Gareth: And prayers

Nikolai: You're going to NEED them.

Y'ALL, I have this weird headcannon that Vaughn wears a lot of rings. Like one on every finger, minimum. Yulian acts like there stupid at the start, but then he starts getting weirdly attached to them?? LIKE WHENEVER'S HE'S ANXIOUS, HE JUST LIKE STARTS TRACING PATTERNS ON THEM. Or if he’s pulling Vaughn somewhere, he doesn’t grab his hand, he grabs a ring. AND LIKE SOON, IT'S NOT EVEN A HABIT ANYMORE, ITS A REFLEX.

THENN, THEY HAVE THIS STUPID BREAKUP THAT THEY PROBABLY WILL HAVE IN THE MIDDLE-END OF THE BOOK- and Vaughn starts acting weird about the rings. He like stops wearing them. Keeps one of them in his pocket. Maybe holds onto them when he thinks no one’s watching. And if someone does ask, he’s like “It’s just a habit” BUT LIKE, SIR, BE SERIOUS, we all know it’s because of Yulian. He won’t say it, obviously, because he’s emotionally constipated, but those rings used to be just accessories. Now they feel like ghosts of Yulian.

OKAYYY HERE ME OUT: Bro Vaughn and Yulian def started sleeping together right after the intiation.

OKAYYY SO- Like Gareth mentioned that Vaughn immediately left for "New York" as soon as the initation ended. C'MONNN HE PROBABLY DIDN'T. I'M GUESSING THAT HE WAS WITH YULIAN.

ANDD, ANDD, THAT ONE PART WHERE GARETH CALLS VAUGHN PANICKING BECAUSE KAYDEN WAS SHOT? Yeahh, bro was def with Yulian at that time. NO EXCEPTIONS. Like why would he have to go out the room... if he didn't have someone with him in the room that he didn't particularly wanna disturb??

Oh and the rustling coming from Vaughn's end that Gaz mentioned was def him untangling himself from Yulian's hold because Yulian is clingy af when it comes to himm.

(Also, tiny question. How do you guys imagine Yulian to look like?? He's very dark brunette hair with green-gray eyes to me, idkk why 😭)

Y'know whattt, imma just join everyone here in screaming over Rina Verse characters. I CAN'T WAIT ANYMORE FOR VAUGHN YULIAN, HELPPP 😭😭. I need someone to talk about them withhh, and none of my friends are read the books. PLEASE, IF ANYONE'S READ THE BOOKS, AND WANNA SCREAM OVER THE CHARATERS TOGETHER, DM MEE.

Reader's Rant

Okay so I had finished reading the Legacy of Gods Series few days ago so here are my thoughts(after lots of thinking,psychoanalysing and self arguing)

1)RINA PROMOTING MISOGYNISTIC VIEWS:

•The "virgin trope" is seriously not a trope at this point when each and every book has this.She makes it seem as if the fmc has commited blasphemy(What's her obsession with this word anyways.Its everywhere in her books.The blasphemy😯) if she has slept with someone before the mc.Wth!?And every male character is a casanova.Like we will find virgin Mcs hot too okay?? Especially in Ava's case like I thought okay finally we have a fmc who has had a life before mc but no?Like she makes it seem Ava have a grandiose sex life and later makes her a virgin too!?Like its okay to have experience and its totally okay to not marry the first guy you sleep with.

I also think that having literally ALL men experienced in EVERY SINGLE THING is also so frustrating.Like it would have been cool if Eli or Creighton were not u know??She makes it seem as a chore the men have to do the second they turn 18

•Another example of misogyny is the extreme sense of ownership they have for all the women in their life. Like the dad's are seriously crossing limits.Protectiveness is cute but the no-twat-is-good-enough-for-my-princess shit is exhausting.Jeremy and Landon are wayyy too controlling.Its literally offensive.You will HATE such a brother and dad for life and beyond.

•She made all women literal doormats.Enough said. (except Ava,Ari and Maya-who she turned into a villain because she has a life so she should not be the good sister)

•The fmcs had all sort of problems, worries,insecurities blah blah which could not be cured by besties, family, friends, therapists nope!They could only be cured within 2 chapters at most once the perfect mc decides to help!

•Over possessiveness.Hated it.Like listen I can still somehow get Killian's jealousy towards Remi(by dark romance standards ONLY) but Creighton has been close friends with Remi since birth and how he literally does not allow a single friendly touch!?And his insta posts each statng MINE MINE MINE repeatedly felt embarrassing and cringe rather than hot and when he tells her to stop following people like WHAT!?

2)UNFULFILLED TROPES AND PROMISES:

I am the kind of reader who gives great attention to the blurbs and tropes before reading a book.

•God of Pain is a grumpy x sunshine.Now I believe this was mentioned due to the appeal and popularity of the trope but Annika is not a sunshine at all.Sunshine character is not one which ACTS and pretends to be happy,outgoing and perfect while she has her insecurities,fears and troubles eat her up inside(her words)

•God of fury has been said to have the trope mafia prince x GOLDEN BOY which is not accurate.Anyone who has read the books should know this already ig.

•God of war which happens to be my fav from the series has false claimed tropes too.Like it was NOT a marriage of convenience.Eli forced the proximity upon Ava by forcing her to marry him(I believe forced proximity means both leads who hate each other are forced to be closer)and the sunshine point is similar as that of Annika.Imagine if someone is searching for a stand alone marriage of convenience and forced proximity....they'll be sad,angry and frustrated u know(Not me.I loved the book)

•Being an apathatic sociopath and selfish narcissist is different.Research your attributes Rina.

•Rina literally backtracks upon Eli's feelings in gow.Repeatedly mentions how Eli had no feelings for Ava before Uni.While she had stated in Royal Elite epilogue how Eli kisses new born Ava,calls her pretty,is asking Aiden for marriage pact,stares at her.Even in gow Ava mentions that he caused guys disappear even when she was in HIGH SCHOOL."Yeah he had no interest at all"😑(THE LAST LINE WAS SARCASM.YES SOME PEOPLE NEED IT TO BE SPELLED OUT.your welcome)

•Mia's selective mutism was played with totally wrong.AGAIN RESEARCH RINA!

3)PROBLEMS IN THE BOOKS

•The extremely perfect mcs who are geniuses(Einstein who?),strong,attractive all the positive attributes who can think of other than a heart ofc.Like is it wrong if at least one mc has worked hard for the way they are!?Nope these are born perfections who can cure world hunger but will not because the world does not deserve it. Fmcs have all sorts of issues(other than being spineless,submissive doormats.Not Ava,Ari,Maya) which will be cured by the MC!Yeah!(Though the way Eli helps Ava is actually book perfect,heart warming and realistic.Its quite real that her parents and Cecily babied her and could not handle hard decisions that could benefit her)

•BRATS PLAYING GODS!All the mcs are over privileged brats who have done nothing but be born to "earn" their "god" status.Like they are literal UNI kids.Like they were all spoiled brats basically criminals who were setting things(buildings) on fire and hurting and killing people like what!?

•THEIR AGES AND THEIR*ahem* ACTIONS!?Their ages in their respective books:

Killian(19)-Glyndon(19)😱😲😵😶 Creighton(20)-Annika(17-18) Jeremy(23-24)-Cecily(20) Landon(23)-Mia(18-19) Nikolai(19)-Brandon(23) Eli and Ava had time skip so it was okay(29 and 23)

Like their ages are seriously concerning.I especially wanna talk about Creighton and Annika.Annika is literally a child and her book basically had her having some sort of Stockholm Syndrome.

I ABSOLUTELY HATED how creighton won't let Annika speak or talk to him without him adding the numbers iykyk.LIKE I hate how I have read soo many posts yet none mentions it!!?And how Annika is shown to have been cleared of her problems after she has sex !?And Creigh acts like a divorced 38 year old guy with an adult kid while Annika is has 0 personality(Haters can go cry a river)I really wanted Annika to leave him u know?And what was that soap opera shit with the gun and crying and sobbing and kidnapping(Which is okay because she revealed to Ava,Glyn,Cecy that its her fantasy😑)and because we are going all in so lets add suicide shit too.And yeah she was ready to kill herself yesterday and is sunshine and rainbows today yeah!!

Killian has had loads of experience in every kind of sexual activity with both men and women and in clubs and whatnot at 19 and he is bored of all that now😂😑

Ohh I almost forgot!Its literally sooo stupid and meaningless that the girls experience whatever fantasy they shared during a drunk night with each other😂😂😂Like Rina basically wants to sorta convey that the girls "wished" for it😂(Think before you wish folks!)

Zero family dynamics other than the fathers making a one chapter visit talking about the Everlasting love for their wives,their doormat of a princess daughters and zero say in all the "emotional trauma" ALL of them have(they wish)

Landon favourism was not good.Especially in gof where it should have been Niko's moment.

Its enough for today I think.

I am not posting it as a hate post.It is RANT as stated,a critical analysis.(Being going through a book hangover from Gow....partially cured through the MADDEST OBSESSION OMG YES!!!)

One last thing!!!!I get that its the creator's wish and whatever but the fact that Rina isn't writing a Remi (An Mc with emotions!!!!)Ariella(Strong fmc!The blasphemy! )and Maya Ilya book sorta shows how she can't change her formula.

KillianLandon -Twisted Desires

Killian had always been a little too curious about Landon King. At first, it was harmless — intrigue over how someone so polished could also be so brutal. But curiosity had a habit of festering in Killian, twisting and evolving into something darker. It started with the way Landon carried himself — all power and arrogance — like he owned every room he walked into. Killian told himself it was just annoyance. That’s why he stared. That’s why he followed Landon’s movements so closely.

But somewhere along the line, the irritation warped into obsession. Slow, creeping, and utterly consuming. It was the kind of obsession that curled beneath Killian’s skin, making his hands twitch whenever Landon spoke too confidently or when that smirk played at the corners of his mouth. On the surface, Killian hated him. That was what everyone saw — sharp glares, biting insults, snide comments. But under all that, he wanted Landon. Wanted in a way that made his chest tighten and his throat dry. It wasn’t soft or sweet — it was vicious, like the need to conquer something dangerous.

He’d never admit it. Not out loud. Not even to himself on most days.

The rivalry between their groups was too strong, the hatred too deep-rooted. And no one could openly want a King, especially not a Heathen. It was practically asking for a death sentence. Killian had always been good at hiding things — the morbid fascinations, the dark thoughts — but this? This was different.

The only one who even remotely knew was Gareth, his brother. Killian remembered the moment too well — Gareth walking in on him watching a video of Landon at one of the underground fights, not even bothering to hide the way his eyes lingered too long on the blood-smeared jawline or the way Landon moved like a predator.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Gareth had muttered.

Killian had only smirked, trying to play it off. “Curiosity, that’s all.”

Gareth hadn’t bought it for a second. “You and your taste in men, Kill. Keep telling yourself that curiosity lie..”

But Gareth wouldn’t tell anyone — Killian knew that much.

Landon, on the other hand, barely noticed him. Why would he? Landon didn’t care about anyone from the Heathens, unless they were bleeding out at his feet. Killian hated how much that thought pissed him off — how it made something sharp twist in his chest.

But he was patient. Obsessions like his didn’t burn out quickly. And someday, he’d make Landon notice him — not as an enemy, but as something else entirely. Something that owned him.

………………………………………………………..

Landon King didn’t give a damn about the Heathens. To him, they were nothing more than annoying cockroaches — loud, arrogant, and constantly trying to bite at his ankles like they stood a chance. He was a King. His bloodline ran with power, old money, and the kind of dominance people couldn’t fake. The Heathens should be grateful he even acknowledged their existence, let alone occasionally crushed them beneath his perfectly polished shoe.

But Killian Carson... now, he was different.

At first, Landon didn’t care for him either — just another mafia prince with too much power and not enough discipline. But then, he noticed the cracks. The tiny, almost invisible fissures beneath Killian’s perfect mask. On the surface, Killian was flawless — calm, cold, collected — but Landon saw more. The small twitch of his jaw when someone got too close, the way his hands flexed like they were holding something back, and most importantly, the way his eyes sometimes lost that detached sheen, replaced by something darker.

It intrigued him. No — it obsessed him.

Landon found himself watching Killian more than he wanted to admit. Picking apart every little tell, trying to unravel him. There was something raw beneath that pristine facade, something Landon needed to see — to break open. He didn’t just want to know Killian; he wanted to own him. Completely. Mind, body, every dark secret.

And that thought pissed him off.

Because Landon didn’t bring people into his world, let alone his space. His room was sacred — a place untouched by the filth of others, even his closest friends. But the idea of Killian there, underneath him, wrecked and ruined, was now haunting Landon’s thoughts in the worst way possible.

He hated Killian — despised the smug smirks, the cold stares, the fact that he acted like he was untouchable. But fuck, he also wanted to pin him down and fuck that arrogance right out of him.

It was maddening. A King should never want a Heathen. But Landon wasn’t just any King — he was the one who always got what he wanted.

And right now? He wanted to break Killian Carson apart — piece by beautiful, dark piece.

…………………………………………………………….

The air outside the underground fight club was thick with smoke, sweat, and tension — a perfect mix of chaos that Landon King thrived in. But tonight, something else pulled his attention.

Killian Carson.

Leaning against the grimy wall of the alley, a cigarette hanging loosely between his fingers, looking like he owned the fucking world. That calm, detached aura — it irritated Landon to no end. Always so composed, so perfect, like nothing could touch him.

Landon hated that about Killian.

And yet, here he was, walking straight toward him.

Killian didn’t look up, even when Landon got close enough to feel the warmth radiating off him. That smug arrogance was exactly why Landon was going to ruin him.

Without a word, Landon plucked the cigarette from Killian’s fingers. Finally, Killian’s gaze flicked to him, sharp and calculating — but he didn’t speak.

Landon smirked, brought the cigarette to his lips, inhaled deep, and then leaned in, grabbing Killian’s jaw with a rough grip. Their faces were inches apart, breaths mingling. Killian’s eyes widened slightly — not enough for most people to notice, but Landon saw it.

Then, without hesitation, Landon shotgunned the smoke directly into Killian’s mouth.

For a moment — five, six seconds — Killian let him. Processing the sheer audacity, the shock of it, maybe even liking it, though he’d never admit that. The taste, the heat — it hit him all at once.

But Killian wasn’t someone who stayed passive for long.

His hand shot up, grabbing Landon by the collar and yanking him forward. Their mouths clashed in a violent mess of teeth and tongues, more fight than kiss. It was all sharp edges and dominance, neither willing to give in.

Landon pushed Killian hard against the wall, pinning him there, one knee between his legs. Killian’s breath hitched, but he didn’t stop — biting Landon’s lip hard enough to taste blood. Landon growled, the metallic tang mixing with the nicotine on his tongue.

Fuck, this was addictive.

Eventually, Landon broke the kiss, breathing hard, but his hands didn’t move from Killian’s throat, fingers pressing in just enough to leave a message. “You’re not as perfect as you pretend to be.”

Killian smirked, voice low and rough. “Neither are you.”

That was all it took.

The next thing they knew, they were speeding away in Landon’s car, silence stretched thin between them, the kind that buzzed with tension. They didn’t speak — didn’t need to.

Landon drove them to a remote forest clearing, the kind of place no one would stumble upon by accident. The car door slammed, and within seconds, they were back at it — fists curled into collars, shoving, fighting.

“Why the fuck do you hate me so much?” Killian snarled, shoving Landon back.

“I don’t,” Landon spat, pushing Killian against a tree, pinning his wrists above his head. “I want to own you.”

The fight dissolved into something primal — messy, raw. Their mouths crashed again, and soon enough, Killian’s back was digging into the rough bark, Landon’s hands gripping his thighs, lifting him up effortlessly.

The cold night air was nothing compared to the heat between them.

Landon’s mouth traced Killian’s neck, biting down hard, sucking bruises into his pale skin — marks that would last days. Killian gasped, the mixture of pain and pleasure pushing him to the edge. Landon’s hand wrapped around Killian’s throat, tightening just enough to make his vision blur at the edges, and Killian moaned — actually moaned — as tears pricked his eyes.

“Look at you,” Landon growled, voice dripping with satisfaction. “Fucking perfect when you cry.”

Killian’s nails dug into Landon’s shoulders, desperate, raw, but he didn’t stop him. He couldn’t. The pressure around his throat, the brutal pace Landon set — it was all too much and not enough at the same time.

“Say it,” Landon whispered against his ear, lips brushing the shell. “Tell me who owns you.”

Killian’s breath hitched, a tear slipping down his cheek, mixing with the sweat and dirt. His pride battled with the need clawing at him, but the hand tightening around his throat pushed him over the edge.

“You,” he choked out, barely a whisper.

Landon smirked against his skin, biting down hard. “Good boy.”

And as Killian came undone, tears streaking his face, Landon thought he’d never seen anything more beautiful — more his.

Eli King x Killian Carson - God of Wreck

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61493053