Astarawrites - Blog Posts

a branch whipped ominously against the cracked window as rain poured heavily outside. the wind howled, it was indignant and vigorous, enough to blow away a mast of a ship. the weather had been terrible for the past few days, children could not play outside; they were stuck inside the suffocating building they called their home.

tonight was any other night though, save for the treacherous weather. the woman tucked the child in her bed, pressing a fervent kiss to her forehead as she brought the blanket up the child's body. it was routine, every night was like this. it was only this child the woman tucked to bed, perhaps it was because this child was her favorite, as the other children whispered. nonetheless, the child basked in the woman's attention—despite the growing resentment of the other children.

"mother," the child called out, her voice low as she watched the woman take a candlestick from her nightstand.

"yes, dear?" the woman queried as she faced the child, her eyes were full of wonder and innocence, everything she did not have. the child's innocence was something she wanted to protect.

"would you read me a story, please?" the child asked with clasped little hands. this was also routine, the child asked for bedtime stories every night. the woman smiled, a chuckle tearing through her throat. she obliged, not wanting to sadden the little girl.

"once upon a time," the woman started, her fingers tucking the child's hair behind her ear as she spoke. the child listened intently, focused and unaware of the things that were about to happen.

once upon a time, there was a little puppy who lived in a small house along with her siblings. they were well taken care of by their mother and the humans who cared for them. the puppy was quite obnoxious and stubborn, however. it would disobey its mother and run off into the borders of the forbidden forest. one night, the puppy made a reckless decision—it snuck off and escaped through a round window that its human owners left open. it ran into the forbidden forest, where it was met with sprawling greenery. on the outside, the forbidden forest seemed to decay, but right now, it was akin to an oasis, a wonderland where the puppy was free to roam and play.

the puppy explored the wondrous forest, taking in its refreshing atmosphere. the birds flew high in the bright blue sky that never seemed to dim. the day never seemed to die, night never seemed to rise. it was always sunny, the perfect weather to play. soon, the puppy met a bear deep in the forest and they became friends. the bear taught the puppy the ways of the forest and it gave the puppy gifts. the bear told the puppy that it could stay here and play forever, but it must not, under any circumstances, go deeper into the forest where a thick vine connected a chasm. the puppy obliged, but the more it thought about it, the more it became curious. what was over there? the puppy disobeyed yet again, out of its own curiosity. it crossed the vine, and was met with a twisted forest filled with sin and everything dark. the bear appeared in front of the puppy, its form twisting into a monster. the monster was furious, the puppy had disobeyed again and again. as punishment, the monster took the puppy's eyes; this way, the puppy could not see anymore. the puppy cried out as its vision was clouded with eternal darkness; it was a lesson, the monster said, your eyes will be mine and no longer yours. your paws will be mine, your ears will be mine, your soul will be mine. nothing would be yours. the twisted forest would eat you for your disobedience. the puppy felt something twisting around its ankles, dragging it deep into the soil. it did not feel anything, for its soul was the monster's now. and as it felt the soil close up around its body, the puppy became a part of this twisted forest. it became one of the many sins that were stuck in it, forever.

by the time the woman was finished telling the grim story, the child had fallen asleep. the rain grew softer, the wind grew tame. the weather had fallen asleep along with the child.

with a smile, the woman stood from where she was sitting on the side of the child's bed. she blew out the flickering flame of the candle, and stepped out from the child's bedroom with a whisper before closing the door.

"goodnight, ynes."

— A.

bad ending.

a branch whipped ominously against the cracked window as rain poured heavily outside. the wind howled, it was indignant and vigorous, enough to blow away a mast of a ship. the weather had been terrible for the past few days, children could not play outside; they were stuck inside the suffocating building they called their home.

tonight was any other night though, save for the treacherous weather. the woman tucked the child in her bed, pressing a fervent kiss to her forehead as she brought the blanket up the child's body. it was routine, every night was like this. it was only this child the woman tucked to bed, perhaps it was because this child was her favorite, as the other children whispered. nonetheless, the child basked in the woman's attention—despite the growing resentment of the other children.

"mother," the child called out, her voice low as she watched the woman take a candlestick from her nightstand.

"yes, dear?" the woman queried as she faced the child, her eyes were full of wonder and innocence, everything she did not have. the child's innocence was something she wanted to protect.

"would you read me a story, please?" the child asked with clasped little hands. this was also routine, the child asked for bedtime stories every night. the woman smiled, a chuckle tearing through her throat. she obliged, not wanting to sadden the little girl.

"once upon a time," the woman started, her fingers tucking the child's hair behind her ear as she spoke. the child listened intently, focused and unaware of the things that were about to happen.

once upon a time, there was a little puppy who lived in a small house along with her siblings. they were well taken care of by their mother and the humans who cared for them. the puppy was quite obnoxious and stubborn, however. it would disobey its mother and run off into the borders of the forbidden forest. one night, the puppy made a reckless decision—it snuck off and escaped through a round window that its human owners left open. it ran into the forbidden forest, where it was met with sprawling greenery. on the outside, the forbidden forest seemed to decay, but right now, it was akin to an oasis, a wonderland where the puppy was free to roam and play.

the puppy explored the wondrous forest, taking in its refreshing atmosphere. the birds flew high in the bright blue sky that never seemed to dim. the day never seemed to die, night never seemed to rise. it was always sunny, the perfect weather to play. soon, the puppy met a bear deep in the forest and they became friends. the bear taught the puppy the ways of the forest and it gave the puppy gifts. the bear told the puppy that it could stay here and play forever, but it must not, under any circumstances, go deeper into the forest where a thick vine connected a chasm. the puppy obliged, but the more it thought about it, the more it became curious. what was over there? the puppy disobeyed yet again, out of its own curiosity. it crossed the vine, and was met with a twisted forest filled with sin and everything dark. the bear appeared in front of the puppy, its form twisting into a monster. the monster was furious, the puppy had disobeyed again and again. as punishment, the monster took the puppy's eyes; this way, the puppy could not see anymore. the puppy cried out as its vision was clouded with eternal darkness; it was a lesson, the monster said. and the puppy was cursed to stay in this dark forest without its eyes forever.

by the time the woman was finished telling the grim story, the child had fallen asleep. the rain grew softer, the wind grew tame. the weather had fallen asleep along with the child.

with a smile, the woman stood from where she was sitting on the side of the child's bed. she blew out the flickering flame of the candle, and stepped out from the child's bedroom with a whisper before closing the door.

"goodnight, ynes."

— A.

good ending.

the buzz of the crowd as the traffic light turned green snapped mayven out of her thoughts, she had been absentmindedly fiddling with the pocket watch she bought from the antique shop earlier. she thought about how kael would scold her for zoning out in public again as she crossed the pedestrian street among other people, it was one of her habits: to zone out. kael didn`t mind, but he worried about her. sometimes, she would zone out and become unaware with her surroundings.

the click of her shoes was what she focused on as she walked and walked until her feet reached the front door of the cafe--her cafe, their cafe. she stopped and stared, she stared at the building that was the evidence of their shared dreams coming true, she stared at the people who ordered coffee in it, she stared at her love and her friend chatting by the counter. most nights, it seemed like a dream. most nights, mayven would stare up at the ceiling and pray that this life she had now was not some dream she would wake up from one day.

as if sensing her presence, kael looked up and saw mayven standing outside of their cafe, a look of wonder twinkling in her brown eyes. she seemed distraught, lost in the depths of her own mind. he could not quite understand what was going on in that imaginative brain of hers, even if he already knew her well, too well sometimes.

kael dropped the cloth he was using to wipe the counter, circling around it as he made his way toward mayven. zyvia turned her head to the direction he was heading as he suddenly dropped their conversation, she saw mayven looking zoned out as usual. she could not lie when she thought that mayven looked more like a creep rather than the owner of the cafe, the notion made her chuckle to herself as she continued to sip her matcha latte.

kael approached the glass door and mayven shook her head when he opened it. he took her hand and gently tugged her inside the cafe, his thumb rubbed against her knuckles delicately as he whispered a quiet greeting in her ear before he stepped back to give her some space. they were still in public, it was inappropriate to show some affection.

"where have you been?" kael asked, concern filling his timbrous tone. it was also his way to ask if she was alright, mayven knew him too well already.

"I found this antique shop," mayven brought the trinket from her pocket, it glinted beneath the sunlight as it poured through the window. "I bought this impulsively." it was a vague answer, but kael understood that the pocket watch must have intrigued her enough to buy it, so he did not press on any further.

"ziv`s here," he murmured as he took her hand and led her to the counter where zyvia was seated by. "why don`t you take a seat, yeah? I`ll brew you coffee." mayven obliged with a small smile as she sat down beside zyvia. the girl had already finished her drink and was ready to order some more.

"let me guess," zyvia mused, "you went to a store and bought something, impulsively might I add." and mayven laughed, the sound did not go unheard by kael, zyvia saw how he visibly tensed at her laughter. sometimes, the boy was too head over heels for her friend. she did not tease him about it though, they both knew zyvia was also the same for dalziel.

"you can`t blame me, we all impulsively buy something once or twice within our lifetime." mayven replied and zyvia nodded, it was true, she could not argue about that. "oh, by the way, where`s alzie? she didn`t come with you?" she asked at the same moment kael slid their coffee toward them: one was caramel latte--mayven`s guilty favorite--and the other was matcha topped with strawberry drizzle.

"she`s at home, I went here right after my volleyball practice, but I told her to come with orion." zyvia said as she stirred her drink with a straw. the paper straw immediately folding from the liquid, damn those paper straws. mayven took another straw from the stash, handing it over to zyvia as she listened to her reply. "ah, alright." mayven muttered as she took a sip of her drink, loving the way it tasted. kael had already perfected making her favorite coffee it seemed.

cosmo fell haphazardly on the floor as he tried to saunter toward mayven and ziv, the lower walls and the floor was padded with foam for this. the cat suffered from cerebellar hypoplasia, which made him a bit wobbly, but it did not make him less of a normal cat. him and orion had their own little corner by the staff room in the cafe, it was built specifically for the both of them.

"aww," mayven cooed as she hopped off of the barstool and picked the cat up. he left a considerable amount of fur behind as she did, he was too fluffy. then again, ragdoll cats were covered in a lot of fur. she sat him on the counter as she hopped onto the barstool, cosmo wobbled, but mayven helped him stay upright as he licked his paws.

"cosmo must`ve heard us talk about his best friend," zyvia joked. "even I would perk up whenever someone talks about you." she slung her arm around mayven`s shoulder while laughing. it has always been like this, wasn`t it? even when they were toddlers, zyvia has been with mayven. zyvia was her first friend, and mayven was hers. their bond went beyond friendship, they were practically sisters at this point. and nothing would ever change that. they were stuck together for life.

a little while later, the front door opened and dalziel walked through with orion in her arms. the cafe was still buzzing with people at this time, there were always more people before closing time. mayven knew kael was tired from the work, so she switched in and let him rest. thankfully, the customers were slowly dissipating as closing time neared.

"hi, sorry I`m late." dalziel greeted as she wove through the full tables and approached the counter, pressing a kiss in zyvia`s cheek as she did. the girl`s face grew beet red from the act of affection, her head diverting to some other direction to ease her nerves. "nice to see you, alzie. it`s okay, we know you had some pressing matters to attend to." mayven responded as she took dalziel`s drink from the fridge, it was the same as zyvia`s, they both had the same tastes. "no, I didn`t have urgent matters to attend to, it was traffic. we all know how it is in manila." dalziel sighed, placing orion down on the floor as she sat beside zyvia. "where`s kael?" she asked. "oh, he`s resting in the staff room. the poor guy`s been working all day." mayven responded, earning a hum of acknowledgement from dalziel.

mayven watched as dalziel conversed with zyvia after the girl calmed her fizzling nerves. a smile stretched upon her face knowing how much zyvia loved dalziel, they were two peas in a pod, despite the troubles in their relationship. it was nice to see them happy. they were all right where they wanted to be. even after separating from each other as they entered college, their bond stayed the same.

and mayven couldn`t help but be grateful to be surrounded by the people she loved most.

— A.

two of three.

the bell chimes as the front door of the antique shop opens. the store was quiet, but not in an uncomfortable way. there weren't many people, not many liked antiques anyway. this shop was hidden, tucked away in some corner in manila. nonetheless, there was something about it that drew mayven in. perhaps it was the vintage feel of the shop, or it was the stack of photos in a cardboard box on the counter, or maybe it was the picture book in the front shelf of the shop. she didn't know either.

a creak echoed from the dusty floorboards as mayven walked towards the counter, her hand hovering over the box before blindly picking one photo from the stack. it was old, evident from the brown stain that coated the edges of the picture. it contained a loving couple, their features somewhat defined despite the black and white film. mayven had always been fascinated by photos, they were priceless memories printed on paper. she didn't have expertise on photography, but she bought a camera back then just to take pictures. she knew how they would look back on it one day. that was why she had a room in their apartment where she hung polaroid pictures of her friends and their highschool days.

and she was right, of course. they would often visit that room and talk about the days when they were young and reckless. they would stare at the photos hanging on the wall, thin red string delicately woven through the pictures as if connecting one precious memory to another.

mayven places the photo back in the stack as she turns to move toward the front shelf of the shop where the picture book was placed. why? she wasn't sure either, it was as if her feet had their own minds. she looked up and reached for the book. it was wrapped in cobwebs and dust, a piece of literature forgotten with time. it was a story about a girl not being able to be with the boy she loved, much like romeo and juliet. it was your typical fairytale, one that was sure to captivate a kid's mind and heart, even she couldn't lie that she loved these stories. as a child, she wanted love like that, too. and growing up, she found it in the most unlikely place. she found it in the wedges of concrete where it bloomed like a flower. she found it in the middle of a dessert where an oasis sat still. she found it in the warmth that emanated from the fire in a hearth on christmas eve. she found it in her best friend, the one who she thought she wouldn't fall for.

on her way out of the shop, a glint of gold caught her eye. it was a pocket watch on the bottom shelf, the glass encasing it was cracked, the time stuck in 10:23. she didn't know what came over her when she took the watch and bought it impulsively. mayven didn't quite understand herself sometimes, but the pocket watch reminded her of the invaluable meaning of time.

and so, mayven left the antique shop knowing she bought something valuable from it.

— A.

one of three.

the moon loved the sun. so much so, that he would settle on seeing her once. their love was doomed to put simply, forever chasing each other through the sky. the sun would only catch a glimpse of him when it was time for her to sleep at dusk, and the moon would only see his love before he dies at sunrise. but the gods gave them a chance to meet for they loved each other strongly, and this was how the eclipse was created. everytime there was an eclipse, it was two lovers meeting each other.

that was the case for claudia and james. they were star-crossed, forever chasing each other through the sky and the universe, but they were never fated to be with each other. james found his sun in claudia despite her short time on earth. she may be a phantom, but she was more human than the ones he met. claudia was the same, she found solace in his comforting presence. he had been the light to her darkness.

but alas, claudia knew their growing love was not to be. it was impossible, diabolical—how can a ghost fall in love with a human? a spirit who could not ascend to the afterlife because of her unrest? even so, claudia could not help but be greedy. she wanted to have his love for herself, if only for a little bit more. she prayed every night to whatever god out there was willing to listen to her sorrows. every night was the same, she'd whisper: "give me more time." but was it not freedom she wanted? did she not want to be freed from her shackles on earth and finally ascend to the afterlife? why the change of heart now? because she loved the human? because she finally had the love she wanted to have while she was alive?

the gods let her have more time, but they warned her of the consequences. the love she was greedy for was something she was willing to sacrifice. claudia knew then that she had to let him go.

and in her final moments, she watched him fall in love with another in the shadows. slowly she faded with a smile on her face. she did not regret anything, she did not regret falling in love with someone she was not meant to be with. in fact, she took pride in it. for loving him meant she was able to take that love with her to the afterlife. for being able to love was an affable feeling. falling in love is artless—simple and natural—but it is the most wonderful feeling in the world.

and claudia finally knew why the moon settled on seeing his love once.

— A.

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