Latest Posts by soil-just-needs-water-to-be - Page 8
Blurb idea like maybe when they are in a relationship george is like matty u need a hair cut but he agrees to george cutting it if he lets matty do the same to him
See first off I see them just playing FIFA or watching a documentary on the TV and Matty is laying on George’s lap while George threads his hand through Mattys hair but his fingers keep getting caught in knots so he looks down at him as Matty is falling asleep and he’s like “Hey love ! I think it might be time for a haircut again”, in Mattys sleep addled brain he just nods not really hearing what’s George says
But the next day when there out George stops outside a barber Matty is like “what are we doing “, George then retells Matty agreed to last nigh but Matty is stood shaking his head “I don’t want to George , I like my hair like this” ,
“But it’s getting long love it getting knotty”
“I can just brush it more”
George then explains that everything will be okay, and the he’s getting his hair cut too so there’s nothing to worry about , they can get it done together, quickly an idea builds in Mattys head and George can tell he’s thinking “what’s that face about huh?”
“I’ll get my hair cut if you do it , I can do your too”, he’s smiling at George now and George can’t really see why it would be a bad idea for them to do it for each other because if they mess up it’s fine they can both just buzz it.
“Alright”
So later on the day
A laughter can be heard trailing through the loft that they share together and laughter along with a drowned buzzing, Matty was stood over George and George is sat on the floor in the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his shoulders so that hair could be collected easier
“So how would you like your hair today Mr Daniel?” Matty enquired just like he was an actual barber.
“How about you just buzz it love , that’ll be new and easier to control “ Matty was stood for a second contemplating the idea, trying to imagine what it would look like then he slowly brings the clippers to George’s hair a begins his art work. Still pretending he’s a barber
“Any plans this weekend then”
“Just studio work really and date night with Matty, that’s why I’m getting a haircut, he should be through next” , Matty laughed along with him smiling at the prospect of Date night, they’d been so busy lately that they hadn’t gotten to do much together as of late. When he was finished George’s hair he put the clippers down and carefully pulled him up to see in the mirror
“Do you like it”
“I love it Matty , thank you, it’s your turn now”
Matty takes George’s place on the floor slightly nervous “can we just put it a little bit shorter, I don’t want it to short and maybe just tidy up the sides” , he was combing through his hair explaining to George how he’d like it and how it needs to be done
“That I can do love”
Hey guys it’s me ,
I hope everyone who has been reading Heart Out has been having a lovely time reading it and enjoys it, I’m really struggling with the next chapter it just doesn’t seem to be flowing , I know I send out a couple a week, but I’m sorry but I don’t think I’ll be getting one out this week. I’m so sorry if your waiting BUT what I can do for you while you wait is do some BLURBS OR IDEAS that you all may have , if you do have anything you’d like me to hash out or give blurbs for let me know and I’ll get them written for you.
IM SO HAPPY THAT YOU ARE ALL GIVING IT SO MUCH LOVE AND ITS SOOOO APPRECIATED ❤️❤️
Thank you again
Dylan 💥
Chapter 23
Word Count : 2182
Mention of fight details , flirting
I actually really enjoyed writing this one , I don’t know why, there was just something about it , any thoughts and comments would be much appreciated from you guys , I’m actually in love with these lads
George's POV
Once the school had gone over the incident with Reece and I like a thousand times and checked details with others that's when they called my dad to come and get me. That was when the shit hit the fan, I was just sat in the receptionist office when my dad came storming through the doors and just stood there waiting for me to stand up, I followed him out just in wait of the onslaught of trouble I'm about to be in. Once we got into the car that was when it began
"What the fuck George , I literally just spoke to you this morning about your behaviour lately" , he's red in the face and I can already see that he's seething , he's had to leave work to come and get me but I'm not going to just sit and take it right now.
"What , I was sticking up for a friend, what did you expect me to do , just leave him to get tormented, you raised me better than that , right?" , I raise my voice a little to get my point across because he has he raised me to look after those who can't or won't do it themselves
"We've had this before though George , we've been telling you since you where 8 years old , there are better ways at resolving your issues then using your hands" , he has been telling me that for the longest time but like nine times out of ten it's not even my fault or me that's started it, I've always just been bigger and teller than most kids so I've always done slightly more damage is that my fault no , I don't think so. I just feel the need to protect people , I always have
"I understand that dad but it wasn't even me who started it" , there we go resorting to the answer of every 5 year old in the world, he started it , Jesus what am I even saying. "Seriously dad , I was just trying to help Joe"
"I know that George and I appreciate you helping your friend , but youve gone and got yourself excluded again, this behaviour of yours needs to be sorted, As I said this morning , I will be grounding you so for the next two weeks you will be home after school , won't be going to that lad Adams is it ?, also I know you won't be at school but I expect you to still be doing your studies and I'll be taking your phone before you go to bed 10 on the dot so you actually get sleep" , A sigh escapes my lips before I even have a second to think about it. "I'm sorry, Is no there a disagreement you have with that"
"No dad" , I just rest back on my seat and close my eyes escaping to my happy place as my dad continues to ramble on while he drives, I don't really catch on to anything he's saying at this point I've lost interest in what he's talking about. The amount of times I've heard this same exact speech a number of times. I know he means well and he’s just trying to get me to be a well upstanding citizen but I’m doing it my way and doing an Okay job. Once I’ve noticed he’s finished his onslaught I take my phone out and shove my headphones in and I really want to talk to Matty right now but he can’t see me like this he’ll just worry.
“Sorry, I got a little bit distracted, What have you been up to then love ?” I wanna see his face it will calm me but if I keep snap chatting him he’ll wonder why I’m not showing him my face “also do you have instagram”
I just rest my phone on my leg until I get a reply , the rest of the drive home was quiet but awkward, my dad drops me at the front door and tells me to make sure I get studying before racing off back to work, my phone goes off once I reach my bedroom , just Matty sending a link to his instagram and he was telling me that he’d spent a lot of the day writing a new song , he had also asked me if I was okay again
“Yeh I’m fine love I promise” , I click on the link that takes me to his instagram page, and there I go losing my breath again at just how gorgeous he is. There was a lot of pictures with his friends and his family but my favourites are the ones of him just looking like he’s asked someone to take it and he’s just being the model that he is. They make me laugh, I can just see him begging his mates to take them . There’s also a lot of pictures of him with his guitars and his band mates playing tiny gigs and he looks so free in them, like he’s having the best time. A cigarette hanging from his mouth or in his hand in like 6 out 10 of them. The latest one was the picture he sent me of himself a Louis so I like it and send a quick
bedforddanes75: That’s my boys right there ❤️
And just leave a few more comments on a few pictures that might be bit weird but I want him to know I’m there. There’s a picture of him with a couple of his friends looking like there at a house party Matty has a bottle of wine in one hand and a cig in the other and he’s smiling like really smiling, like he’s mid laugh or something.
bedforddanes75: You need to be happy like that all the time love ❤️
A notification comes up on the top of my screen slipping me out of my insta stalking “you enjoying yourself there Georgie?”, shit I totally slipped my mind that he’s see all the comments and likes just come in all at once, my checks start to heat up already and I smile to myself and open my texts to reply
“Whoops” , I quickly go back to his insta and find the last picture to comment on just to be cheeky, he’s wearing a Newcastle Football shirt and he’s standing with his dad outside the stadium and I comment
bedforddanes75: Don’t like Mackems ay ? 😂😂
“Your a cheeky sod Daniel”, another text from Matty shows at the top of my screen and it makes me literally laugh out loud.
“Hit a nerve did I?” , I know I’m just winding him up but it’s what I do best really I’m a massive wind up always have been. I throw my rucksack across the room as I forgot I still had it on my back and lay back down probably on my bed “oh , yeh , my uh dad grounded me”, I have to tell him because what if I can’t call him when he needs me , Ill still have my laptop but I have to wait till my parents go to bed
“Why?, can we still call ?”
“Yeh I still have my phone till about 10, but we’ll have to wait to call till my parents are asleep, I’m sorry”, I really hate that I can’t be there for him every minute but I’m sure it’ll be alright we can work it out.
“What happened?”
“Just something at school it’s not important love”, I don’t want him thinking I’m a violent guy because I’m really not, it just get wound up easily especially when bullies are involved. “I can call till my family come home if you like?”
“If that’s okay, I don’t want you in more trouble darling”
“I wanna hear your voice , I miss you” , I’ll have to hide my face from him, I’ll just do some work while I’m calling him so he doesn’t see it. That might work maybe just maybe, I make my way over to my desk and set my laptop up and push the screen further back so it’s facing the roof more so my face isn’t to mu h in veiw then I get my books out to work through some science. Once I’m all set up I pull up Mattys contact and press call and wait for him to pop up
“Heya Darlin” from what I can see he’s sat on his bedroom floor and he’s got his guitar in hand pen sticking out of his mouth and a fag on a tiny ashtray and there’s a million papers scattered around his small body.
“Hi love, you writing something new”, he looks up to the screen for a second before going back to plucking his guitar strings, and I start my work
“I’m trying but I can’t seem to get it right, it’s a nightmare, I’m getting somewhere slowly though” , he looks really into it and I can’t take my eyes away from him , he’s just plucking away and writing stuff down , my mind is already off of the work I should be doing and I’m just watching him while still trying to keep my face out of shot. “Where are you Georgie I can’t see you”
I wave at the screen a little so he can see my hand “I’m right here love”, I want him to see me so he’s happy but I know he’ll just freak out at me if he sees my face covered in cuts. I can’t put that one him right now “I’m just working is all”
“I wanna see you darling, what’s wrong seriously”, he’s dropped the guitar beside him and picked up his laptop and it’s all I can see is his face trying to figure out why he can’t see me.
“Nothings wrong love, I’m just trying to work this stuff out , you can see me in a second I promise” , I know I’m being stupid , and I know it’ll just upset him but it’s better this way once it’s healed it’ll be better , I don’t know how I’m going to keep it from him that long but I’ll have too. There’s a silence for a while , when Matty speaks up again
“George come on tell me what’s wrong please, what happened, you know I won’t judge” , fuck I know that , I know he won’t it’s more of a me thing and sit and think for a while before I decide that fine I’ll just show him.
“Right fine I’ll show you but please don’t think I’m a bad guy” , I pull the screen down and remove my hat so he can see it better , it’s not as bad as I’m making it out to be but it’s still a lot just a bust lip , black eyes growing exponentially and my nose is still a bit messed up, I sigh and look back down at my lap leaning back on my chair. “I got into a fight and I uh , I didn’t want you too see, I didn’t want you to think I’m a bad guy”, he’s searching my face and he’s got a cheeky little smile on his face, I can’t work this kid out sometimes.
“You look hot” , the smile on his face grows bigger when I look back up to him and my eyes widen at his statement, “like scars are beautiful and you look hot, like you defended someone’s honour, that’s fit”.
I scoff a little “your a strange one love but yeh , I was just tryna stick up for my friend Joel, some lad was just winding him up …”, While trying to explain myself, he’s still looking at me with those deep brown eyes, cheekily smiling at me, making me flustered again. “ and uh yeh he threw the first punch like but I got my point across this time I think”
“Is that why you got grounded , being a little rebel”
“Just a-lot went on today , and it all just boiled up to that and I lost it I think, you know just teenage drama”
The smile plastered across his face just keeps getting bigger as I explain “Teenage drama has my heart, teenage angst is what I write about most yanno lad”, we both break down in fits of laughter after that. We’re both red in the face from laughing. “But on a more serious note though is everything okay”
“Yeh I’m grand , I don’t know how the other lad is, but I’m grand, He just keeps getting on at Joel cuz he’s gay, and then after I posted you on my story ealier my ex tried to get information out of me about who you where but I don’t want her to be involved right, want you to myself for now, and my dad was just being a whole fuckin nightmare this morning” , I let out a breath after just that word vomit was a lot.
“I’m sorry that was a lot” , He doesn’t say anything for a minute or two just looking at me his eyes sparkling “what?”
“You want me to yourself?”
chapter 21 and 22 are so good i’m so in love with your writing
do u know when you’re doing the next one? i don’t mean any pressure at all
Thank you soo soo much
Im going to try and get the next one up in the next two to three days but please don’t take my word on that if not then it shouldn’t be too long
Thank you again ❤️
Chapter 22
Can’t remember the word count I publish it in Wattpad before noticing
Some smut in this one
This chapter takes place at the same time as George's just from Mattys perspective
Mattys POV
I didn't wake up too much that night, I was calm for once wasn't restless I just slept. I don't really remember what time it was that I went to sleep it wasn't to long after I called Ross though. I woke up to no alarm or Louis this morning though so my mum must have let me lie in. Bless her. I lay there in bed for around ten minutes really just staring at the roof relaxing in the quiet of the house just basking in it. Then I get up to roll a cigarette picking up my lighter from the bed side table then climb up onto my windowsill and smoke out of the window, slowly , watching the busy streets and people pass by, It so interesting watching people going about there normal lives , how many of them could be suffering but still just take the day head on you know. I drag out the cigarette and just enjoy the peace and people watching. When I'm finished is when I decide to see what my friends are up too. I open up Snapchat first off there's a few messages from Ross asking how I'm doing , if I'm going to school , then when he released I wasn't , just one saying he'll drop by later. I then spot a message from George and when I open it my mouth drops and I gasp "fuck me", he's shirtless ,
his hairs down, his arms look strong and his shoulder so broad I can't take my eyes away from my screen I happen to be staring even well after the picture has gone. I shake my head to get myself to concentrate a little I then feel some movement in my lower body and I left up the covers a little and see I have a semi "Wow that's not happened on it's own in a while" , I kind of don't really want to make it go away, it hasn't happened in its own in so long it's a good feeling. No if I talk to George he might be able to help actually might make it better so that's when I actually decide to reply even though it's been sat on opened for like 5 minutes now, I send off a cheeky little message that hopefully he understands that I'm letting him know I might be ready "
“That's not the best way to wake a man up G 🫠😉, I know I said it takes a while to get things going sometimes but stuff like that will surely work" , and really I usually does take so long now a days to get me worked up , I've been with a few girls in the past few months and they've really had to go for it the meds made it really difficult but that fact it's back to "normal" must mean Georgies doing something right. My hand trails down my body and stops at my waist and of my boxers and I'm kinda nervous about it I don't know why. But before I have a second to even do anything a message comes through from George "I hope you liked it" , bro I can guarantee I more than liked it, I want his help to fix it but I know he's on school and it's kinda upsetting BUT maybe messing with him at school might be a little fun and a little risky, I know what this lads like. So I just send another message back just of me in bed "
More than satisfactory Darling ...but I may have to go sort myself out first before I chat yanno", my hand is now in my boxers and typing with one hand isn't the easiest thing to do but I'm going to do it if I have to. My other hand is just slowly rubbing myself slowly just releasing some pressure it feels good actually. His next snap comes through and he looks looks amazing as always all flustered and cheeks a deep tinge of red and I know he's trying to keep himself composed a little " This is not the right place Matthew", oh trust me I know it's not but if I can just mess around for a little longer that would be fun. The fact he also called me Matthew in this instant send an jolt of excitement right through me, it makes me shiver a little bit. This time I try another tactic, I pull up the camera and flip it and take my hands from my boxers and pull the duvet down a little as I film it , sending it to him with a smile on my face then I quickly send another quick message after letting him know there's no sound so he's safe to play it but i captioned the video with
" You can't be seriously telling me you don't want to see", No picture message comes from his end this time and it's kinda s sad but all I get is a " Love you know I want too , but I'm in class right now", Fuck me man , I drop my phone on my bed and decide this needs to be taken to the shower because I don't want to make a mess of my bed sheets that's kind of embarrassing.
Once I've taken my boxers off I jump in the shower and let the water run warm the images of the other day came pouring into my head , this is when my hand lands back on my dick and I start to rub myself slowly savouring the moment a little , his little flustered movements trying to keep himself together, my head gets a little faster as I indulge the fantasy a little imagining if he had taken it further on the call this causes me to moan into the empty bathroom echoing through it and it's music to my ears. My brain travels to the images of George being flustered and trying to contain himself while at school trying to hide it from people around him "fuck" , as my hand gets faster I can feel my climax coming but due to the pills having messed everything up it hurts a little i hiss through my teeth as I try to push through it , and my climax comes not to long after. Once I'm done I start to actually wash myself down now. Turn the heat up and just relax in the shower peaceful again.
Once I'm done in the shower I wrap myself in the softest towel I own, No messages yet so I send off another picture to George " it would have been more fun if I had your input darling but Wow , that was very much needed ay", I go about just getting myself dressed for the day once I'm prepared I drop down on my bed again and pull my phone out "Sorry about that , anyway how are you?" , I know I can be alot and if he's not interested in me that could have been a bit much for him.
After sending that, I really want to ride some music so I trundle off to get my guitar and notebook and I get myself busy as I turn flip through my notebook and find lyrics that I'd been writing and there's a lot coming to me right now, bringing me back to that night
"Pause it , play it , pause it , play it , pause it"
"Oh my car smells like chocolate"
There was a lot going on that night, we did a lot of mad shit that night, someone was chasing up, we were height as fuck , and we were just messing us about, we'll I was she was trying to drive.
"Hey now, we're building up speed as we're approaching a hill"
Trying to get a melody to this will be hard but I swear it's going to be done. I get lost in the writing and I got so far George messages me back after a while. "you I'm alright love , my dad was doing my head in this morning so I'm a little iffy but I'm fine , how are you feeling?", Bless , family can be annoying sometimes , a reply doesn't come for a long time, but I'm not going to fuss him too much he's at school I can't expect too much but fuck unless I'm writing my mind will wonder and im getting reckless. We have a small back and forth about how we're doing
He replied a while later but it was just a blank screen saying that's he's proud of me for being okay but I'm more concerned about the blank screen
Is he okay ?
Chapter 21 of Heart Out
Word count : 3329
Warnings : Mention of Violence , Use of the F slur , Light smut mention
I’m sorry if this is a really random chapter I just really wanted to get the next chapter up and I’m really enjoying this particular story arc
(Will you all let me know if you’d like the chapters to be longer and I can do that for you’ll )
Slight mention of violence and the F slur and some smutty ness
George's POV
I woke up that morning feeling pretty great about myself. I'd slept and I felt pretty fresh honestly.I haven't felt this good in a while. As I turn to face the other-side of my room my laptop is still on my pillow and Matty is still sound asleep looking so beautiful like WOW I'm sorry he just is so beautiful. The memory of the conversation I overheard last night comes flooding back to me and the butterflies starts fluttering around in my stomach and it's quite a weird feeling I haven't felt in a while. How can this actual angel be interested in me. I sit and overlook his features for a while, his hair so curly, his face so soft but scrunched against the pillow, the duvet wasn't fully wrapped around him and his chest is rising and falling steadily. He looks so small like I could just pick him up and whisk him away and we could just leave this place and be ourselves. I got dragged out of my thoughts by a loud knock on my door "George I need a word please", I roll my eyes on instinct of hearing my dads voice. "Get yourself dressed please and I'll be waiting downstairs".
"Alright" , that's all I'm giving him right now, he's already "chatted" to me enough and I'm not even going to bother with it today. I know what he's going to say and I know exactly how he's going to say it. I pull myself from my bed and start getting ready for the day. Before I begin to get changed I make sure I'm fairly decent I still have shorts on so I walk over to my mirror on the back of my door and snap a quick picture of myself but just of my top half and caption it "Good Morning love" along with a tagged sound of "talk like that" by The presets I don't really know why I picked that song exactly but I really resonate with it right now.I take my time getting dressed because I really can't be bothered talking to my dad right now he had a go yesterday and last night he really doesn't need to do it again. So either way once I'm dressed I skulk downstairs and sit waiting on the sofa for my dad to come and annoy me yet again I just sit on my phone until he's ready.
"Right George , I'm not happy with any of this right now", my dad is sat across from me in the arm chair staring right at me as he's beratting me but I don't even want to look at him so I pick my phone back up and nod along as he continues. "You've got exams next year, your 16 years old, I know you've been smoking and drinking when your round at that Adam kids house and I don't want you pissing your life away George", I've drowned him out at this point. I just want to leave I've never been really good with people telling me what to do. "George are you hearing me, I will have to start taking action if it gets worse, I will have to ground you" , this causes me to roll my eyes again and reply with
" mhm , okay, it's been like a few classes dad, it's not gunna have that much of a drastic downfall in my life", I swear my dad just over reacts about everything, he's just giving me dagger right now. Obviously that wasn't what he wanted me to say.
"Alright sorry dad, I'll take better care, can I go now?, I have stuff to do".
"Yes fine go , but one last thing these late night phone calls you keep having also need to stop , you are up at all hours of the night and keeping everyone awake"
"I don't even make that much noise", I rise from my spot dragging my rucksack with me and go to the kitchen to eat breakfast. Mums made waffles "Thanks mum".
"Your dads right you know , you do need to sleep more at night love , your staying up far to late". Oh my god can't people just leave me alone. I'm not doing anything wrong. I was just being a teenager I don't know anyone else who isn't like me. I roll my eyes again for like the millionth time today and push myself from the counter with a sigh "George come on don't be like that I'm just trying to help you excel"
"I don't need help , I'm doing fine", I do love my parents and I don't mean to be harsh with them but when they get like this , telling me what to do and how to live my life, it just boils my damn blood , I sigh while pushing myself from the counter," can we drop it please , I need to get to school" , I leave without getting a response, quickly collecting my things from my room . My jacket and shoe you know. As I go to leave I hear a soft whimper from Matty on the screen, as he turns around properly facing the camera still asleep. Perfect picture opportunity, I quickly pull my phone out and take picture before turning my sound down and leaving for the day.
I wait till I'm at the bus stop before I light up a cigarette, I then realise I've only got two left, no way is this getting me through the day.
"Yo, Ad, do you or Joe have any smokes, I have two left"
I slip my phone back into my pocket after clicking my music back on, this bus stop is far to busy right now it is every morning but the head space I'm in I could snap at anyone if they come to close to me right now. Everyone does keep there distance though so that's lucky. Just like yesterday I jump into the bus flash the driver my card and shove my lanky body into the corner while pulling my legs up so people don't even attempt to sit next to me. Adam texts me back
" Yeh G, I've got some , not much but still enough", this makes me visibly relax a small bit, I reply back a quick thank you and that id see him later, then I slowly go back to my camera roll to check out the picture I took of Matty, Then something that isn't me takes over my hand and posts the picture to my private story captioned "This One Right Here Is So Pretty" after I post it a smile grows wide on my face because I'm not lying he is. It doesn't take long for a few messages to come pouring in, I know they wont be bad as its just people I trust on this story, There's one from Joel. Carly and Laura, my eyes grow to the size of bowling balls when I see Laura has messaged me, she hasn't spoken to me in two weeks. I immediately open it as it cant make my day any worse and I need to know if she's okay?. As I open it my breath hitches its just the eye emoji under Matty's picture
"Hey you alrite?"
I see her icon flash up a few times before a reply comes through and its not even an answer just another question "who's that then ey?", Do I tell her ? or do I just swerve the question and ask how she is again. She doesn't need to know of anything between Matty and I yet since its not really anything right now.
"I asked a question first L, can you answer that first then we can talk about other stuff ?", again her icon flashes up on the screen a few more times before a quick reply comes through.
“I’m fine George but no I don’t want to talk about other stuff I just wandered who that was but it doesn’t matter”, why is she always like this, won’t even have a conversation with me anymore. This makes me roll my eyes and just shove my phone back into my pocket because this will just cause an argument.
The bus stops outside of school and as I step off I pull a cigarette out of the nearly emptying box and light up. I can hear Adam and Joel before I see them arguing like they do over something or other. “Yo lads came yourselves , what’s got you so heated”
“Just a discussion about games man” , Adam turns around at my voice after claiming that he was right before asking me “you alright lad , you seemed stressed when you texted”, as he tells me this he hands me a handful of cigs “they’ll help ya”
“Just my dad , at my head before I’ve even had a second to wake up”, I take a long drag of my cigarette and pull my headphones out so to not be rude and walk with them as we make our way up the drive to the front door, As everyone goes in I hang back a bit and Adam comes back
“You coming G?” , his arm is sling around my arm and trying to walk me in “I know your dads pissing you off but come on , come prove him wrong you know what your doing” , I shrug a bit and go with him because he’s right I do want to prove my dad wrong but I honestly also just don’t want to be here just to spite him and show him I can make myself a living without needing school
“Thanks Hann, Im coming bro”, we walk through the doors and make our way to class, as I sink into my chair next to Adam in our English class. I see Laura come in through the door and she spots me giving me a solid side eye before scoffing and getting into her chair, I roll my eyes again and of course Adam saw the whole encounter and nudges me
“What was that bro?”
“Nothing she’s just being a nightmare, she saw my story and now she’s sulking” , I pull my phone out of my pocket and show Adam the conversation, as well as the story although he’s already seen it.
“We’ll she might just need you to explain what’s going on , you broke up a month ago and where together a while and she might need closure”, why does he always have to be such a grown up , I just need someone to agree with me. I love him man but he’s to grown up for this stuff. This makes me laugh a little.
“You know what dad your probably right”, We’ve always called him dad for as long as we’ve known him because he’s always just been so sensible and levelheaded it’s freaky sometimes. He just rolls his eyes at me for this as we eventually start the class.
Like most classes that involve a lot of writing it grates on me. Adam helps me a lot though it gets me through, mid way through class a message comes through from Matty I guess he’s not at school today.
Which I get. I open it and smile automatically at the reply
There’s a picture of Matty laying in his bed looking refreshed , all soft and cozy but with the biggest smile on his face “That’s not the best way to wake a man up G 🫠😉, I know I said it takes a while to get things going sometimes but stuff like that will surely work”. We’ll that’s always an opener for a morning , I reply back quickly with a wink
“I hope you like it”, I turn in my seat a little so that no one can see my phone and my back is against the wall. Incase his next reply is a little more forward, Can’t be getting caught with that. I spot his little emoji pop up in the corner.
“More than satisfactory Darling …but I may have to go sort myself out first before I chat yanno” , Wow , can’t do that right now bro , I blush to myself as I sink even further into my chair, still trying to work a little bit so I don’t get into more trouble.
“This is not the right place Matthew” , the picture I send back with this my mouth is wide open in faux shock and I’m making sure to get some of the classroom in shot so he knows where I am. And send it with a chuckle to myself. I really hope no one is paying attention to me right now.
There’s a short video reply this time , he sent a little message reply telling me that there’s no sound so I can open it without worrying , the video is just of him laying in bed obviously but he’s just slowly pulling the duvet further down his chest “You can’t be seriously telling me you don’t want to see”
I breath in trying to control myself he really is a little fuckin devil , this time though I do just send a message rather than a picture because I can feel Adam looking at me “Love you know I want too , but I’m in class right now”, I then just place my phone on the table and look to Adam with a questioning face and shrug.
“That him by any chance G?”, he’s smiling at me so he’s catching on very quickly but It can’t be that obvious right. So I just shrug again as a way of saying what do you mean by that,”you’ve gone bloody scarlet mate , it’s him alright”
“Whatever , you are exactly the bloody same with Carlz stop tormenting me alright”, we both start laughing at that because really we are just a pair of simps, the ending of the class rolls around quickly, I’ve received a few messages from Matty but I’m too nervous to open them because I know what he’s like, but when we’re all sitting out back at break time is when I decide to brave it and open them. There’s only three they can’t be that bad right.
The first
“Too bad , it could have been fun, messing with you while your at school , never done that with anyone yet but it’s on the bucket list😉”
The second came about twenty minutes after
A picture of himself fresh out of the shower , towel wrapped round his small frame “it would have been more fun if I had your input darling but Wow , that was very much needed ay”
The third just a simple “Sorry about that , anyway how are you?”
This causes me to smile and blush again, I don’t know why I know he’s a confident guy when he really pushes himself but he’s so gentle sometimes and just needs to be more himself , I send him a video back of myself and the guys just chilling “you I’m alright love , my dad was doing my head in this morning so I’m a little iffy but I’m fine , how are you feeling?” , as I send of this reply a bunch of lads from the year below begin to approach as and I instantly know this isn’t going to go well.
“Oh look it’s the fag and his body guards , he had to borrow the giant from jack to protect him”, Reece what a bellend man really needs to think up some new insults, I’ve always been labelled the giant from the beanstalk by this kid at this point, I don’t even think his little posey think he’s funny. Joel ignores them because he’s not one for really standing up for himself but I’m not dealing with there crap today
“Do you just wanna get lost Reece” , I don’t look at him to give him the satisfaction that I’m sure he’s craving, I just try to get lost in what I’m doing in my phone Matty has replied but I don’t really get a moment to reply when Reece pipes up.
“Not very friendly of you Georgie , also I don’t think little Joel here needs you too stand up for him he can very much do it himself” , he’s now crouching down next to Joel and ruffling his hair and Joel is just thrashing around trying to get him off.
“Reece seriously get your hands off him” , I hate this kid with every ounce of my being I swear to god , Usually I’m a chill guy , but Reece scratches every itch in the wrong way, so I lean over and shove him back away for Joel
“Not a wise move there Daniel,”, in retaliation he shoved me back, we look like children I can guarantee that but so what. A small argument ensues , but it quickly escalated as I saw his fist quickly come up to me and make contact with my face right in the eye
“Nah you’ll pay for that Reece”, this is when we start knocking three kinds of shit out of each other but now I can feel Adam and Joel trying to pull me off of him but I keep pulling myself from there hold , then I hear and younger kid calling for the head that’s walking around on the pitch and he quickly comes running over, and starts to get student support
“There’s a fight out on the back field I will need extra support to sort this out , right lads come on” , when student support make there way out I can feel them pulling Reece away from me and once he’s finally out of my grasp I jump out of his way and let the student support teacher take me off and I follow them back into the school I can feel blood dripping from my nose and I swear I have a bust lip and I’ll be definitively sporting a black eye tomorrow, when I get to the student support office I’m handed a box of tissues and asked to be sure I clean myself up while they find out what happened , I sit down on the poorly made seats and starts cleaning the blood off of my fave while I’m being spoken too
“What happened outside then Mr Daniel”
“Reece was just messing about with Joel calling him all sorts and it was just really irritating me and he swung at me and it just got way out of hand, I’m sorry Sir”, This day has just gone from bad to worse honestly “Don’t tell my dad please”
“I’m sorry Mr Daniel , you know we don’t tolerate fighting here , we will have to phone your dad and we will have to discuss exclusion”
“Fuck man” , I drop the tissue back on the desk at this and my head ends up in my head “that’s just great another thing thing he can yell at me for, will I have to go now then , and how long for”
“We’ll see you next week , let me phone your dad first please stay here and we’ll go and get Reece’s side of the story before we go any further though”
“Fine”
As he leaves I take my phone from my pocket again and actually read Mattys message “I’m doing okay, I was supposed to go to school today but I didn’t set my alarm and my mum said rest might do me well but it’s only 11:30 and I’m already bored out of my mind”, I’m glad he’s getting rest actually.
I reply back with a blank screen just saying that I’m glad he’s doing okay , and that I’m glad he can get rest.
With that I put my phone back into mt pocket and begin to clean myself up again feeling the blood running again. This isn’t happening today my dads actually gunna kill me
Omg there was a certain part in my fanfiction that my friend was reading and it made her cry and now I feel so bad
blurb ideaa for george so gigi is out with a boy and she runs into george and he is in protective uncle mode hahah he’s like wait until i tell your dad
gigi is maybe fifteen when she starts showing a proper interest in dating. she's had little crushes and maybe a sweet little first kiss or two but honestly was too busy just doing her own thing to be that bothered. but she's been seeing this guy for a bit now and she thinks she really likes him. apart from all the questions swirling in her head, am i old enough, does he like me, what's it like being someone's girlfriend, the biggest one in her mind is, how is she going to tell her dad. she had a boy round when she was a bit younger, and he invited the whole band to dinner to stare the poor lad down. luckily he thought it was cool.
but now she is out with her crush, and her parents think she is with friends, but they're too busy with the little girls to really notice what she is doing today anyway which is fine by her. they've walked to get coffee, well frappucinos, and they are now wandering to the park. it's a warm day and gigi is on summer break and hasn't seen her crush since school broke up a week ago. she's giddy. she's even more giddy when he reaches out and takes her hand, swinging it as she walks. this is what her dad writes songs about. she's convinced!
then she sees him. he'd stand out anyway. bleached blond buzz cut. abnormally tall. dark sunglasses. it's george. he's walking towards them, still at a distance. charli isn't there, which gigi thinks with regret, would probably make the situation less bad.
"oh shit," gigi says. the boy looks at her.
"what? what is it?"
"that guy," she says, pointing to him. he's getting closer. she's panicking. "that's my uncle."
"aw nice!" the boy says, "shall we go say hi?"
"no!" gigi says, "of course not. you have to hide."
"i have to what."
"hide. now."
the boy looks around, grinning, amused at her, "where am i supposed to hide. it's a street."
"erm. er. fuck," gigi says, and george is already too close. he's spotted them. his face has lit up.
"hey gus gus," he says, he scoops her into a hug. "what you up to?"
"oh nothing, just hanging with a friend."
george's eyes land on the boy. he raises an eyebrow.
"friend?" he says.
"yep!" gigi says, brightly, "anyway, we've got to go." she all but shoves the boy on. he doesnt move.
"you alright mate," george is saying to him.
"yeah thanks, you gigi's uncle?"
"yep," george says. he straightens up, tall. he blocks out the sun with his head. he puts them both in shadow. gigi takes a deep breath.
"you taking care of this girl?" george says, his face a hard line now.
"yes sir," the boy says. he holds his own. looking at george in the eye.
"you don't do harm to this girl, correct?" george says.
"yes sir."
george snaps back into his happy self. his goofball self. he smiles.
"i gotta meet my missus. cant keep the ladies waiting," he says, "can we?"
"no sir."
"nice to meet you. bye gussy. come round soon okay?" he says. he hugs gigi goodbye.
"please dont tell my dad," she whispers to him. he doesnt respond until he starts to walk away. he winks at her.
"oh ho ho. i'm telling your dad," he says. and then he is gone.
gigi puts her head in her hands, "we're screwed."
"we'll be okay. you're dad doesnt sound like a hardass," the boy says, putting his arm around gigi.
"he is when it comes to me," she says, "he'll pretend to be all cool with it but he'll stare at you when i'm not looking. cry to my mum about me growing up. "
"nothing i cant handle," the boy says.
"then he'll write a song about you called, little shit get away from my daughter or something."
"that sounds pretty cool," the boy grins at her.
Genuine Fanfiction Question
I need someone's or multiple peoples opinion on something , I'm struggling with song choice for something
Preferably someone who has been reading the fanfic , but id appreciate any help really
THIS IS SO PRODUCER MATTY OF HIM
no cause i want to give him a hug
my bf was like "whats matty gunna do for an hour and a half chat shit ?" and then he just whaps out the noel gallagher slander yessss
LIVING
Can someone please explain to me how 6 out of the last 8 days I’ve gotten drunk but I’m not dead yet
I really felt the need cuz I found my football 😂
Anyone think Matty knows this version 😂😂
Like I know I’m only 22 and there’s no chance of me getting a kid anytime soon, but I just want a kid of my own so I can get them into the 1975 and we can vibe together and stuff and I could take em to gigs and concerts and just arghhh
Just put the shower and having a drink drink while jamming to the AM and the 75 and I’m having a grand time
Chapter 20
Word count : 2942
I think I may actually adore this chapter it’s adorable and everything about it is just so awkward and cute and fluffy , no warning needed , I hope you enjoy it
Matty's POV
I don't take my phone out again until I get up stairs after having a small conversation with my mum about how work was, I said I'd be more open with her so telling her that I got a little stressed but made my way through it is being open right, she gave me a hug and told me to get some sleep because we're going to try to get me back into school tomorrow even if it's just for one lesson , which I made sure to tell her I'll go in all day I'm not "that broken".
Once I open my phone again I notice that there's a small message from George only emojis of the phone , so I text him with a smile on my face "someone is needy tonight huh 🤣", I throw my
Phone onto my bed and strip my shirt and look around for my rucksack because I really need to study and it's not that late so I could do a little bit tonight. I riffle through my rucksack and find my English work because that will bring me the least amount of stress. I pull the work out of my rucksack and place them on my desk then the text alert comes through my phone and I smile to myself and blush when I see it's from George the knot in my stomach that I feel tightens everytime I get a message from him
"Only for you 😉, so can we?", God , this man , Jesus , Im constantly in awe of him all the time, This smile I'm currently sporting never seems to leave my face when I'm talking to him, I bring my phone over to my desk and take a seat as I type my reply
"I really have to study tonight darlin" , I place my phone back down as I hear the sending tone go through, and open my textbook preparing to read through everything I've gone over through the last few years. Without even a second to read it a Snapchat message comes through. This time a picture message from George, he's just sat there at his desk I believe , with his bottom lip perturding outwards, like he's sulking, so I send him the same picture back captioned "don't be like that darlin , I can call you once I've finished" . He reads it instantly so I don't put my phone down and watch his little icon appear on in the corner , even his icon is cute the reply comes through instantaneously
"How long will that be then?", I roll my eyes at this message , affectionately though I have no issue with it it's precious really. So I send back telling him that I shouldn't be too long it all depends how long it takes for me to pull my hair out but also ask what he's being so needy tonight. "I just miss you Matty"
"I miss you too darlin , how about we call but you gotta be quiet while I study , can you do that for me?" , I smile again as I see his little icon pop back up in the corner with and immediate
"YES THAT I CAN DO"
"Go ahead then but shush okay", at this I wait for his call to come through and start going over my last analysis of "The death of a salesmen" text. It takes no less than a second for his call to come through when I answer his face is beaming he's smiling to brightly "heya love"
"Hiya Darlin" , I smile at him before I get myself stuck into my work, I understand he's want to talk but I really need to get in the headspace of studying , as I'm studying I hear tapping from his end his Xbox remote in hand and I want to ask him what he's playing but I shake my head to get myself to concentrate and get back to my book, I've gone over this thing a million times I know it forwards , backwards and sideways but I can do English so if I know it all properly I have a better chance at passing at least one exam you know. After a further ten minutes of reading over the script. I feel like I'm being watched "darlin your starin"
"Nah I ain't" , I look up at him and he is indeed staring, looking at me like I'm the only human in the world that's ever existed
"You most definitely are"
"Aren't you supposed to be studying, sounds like your the one talking, you asked me to be quiet you didn't say I couldn't watch you" , he's smiling at me again looking like such a cheeky fucker that he is
"Alright fine, but stop distracting me okay?, play your game alright" , I sit and watch him smirk at me while he continues clicking away at his game , which gets me to continue with my studying , making notes about all the metaphors and symbolism throughout the text , for a while we just get our stuff done just living in our own worlds but with each other company, when he got bored of his game I'm pretty sure he left for a while but came back with the biggest bowl I've ever seen but I tried to not let him know I noticed he was gone because I'm supposed to be concentrating but I keep finding myself zoning out and just watching him doing his own thing , this last about half an hour just working away at my desk before I zone out completely and find myself just staring at the wall infront of me.
"You tryna shot lasers out your eyes there Matty?" , his voice cracking through the screen startled me out of my day dream
"Huh!", pulling me out of my day dream I shake my head again a little as my hair bounces and look at him just staring at me giggling. "Sorry was just daydreaming"
He puts his bowl into his desk and turn to look at me properly "what you studying , maybe I could help you stay focused?". I roll my eyes and giggle at him again
"I'm doing English, I would be concentrating fine but my heads still banging , and I can't fuckin read it properly cuz I ain't wearing my glasses and can't find my contacts"
"Why aren't you wearing them love, your heads gunna hurt if your straining your eyes"
"I hate them, they just make light lighter and that hurts my eyes so either way somethings gunna hurt", sighing I hold my head in my hands again and shove my books away from my view. "I'll finish it another time, how are feeling anyway darlin?"
"Yeh I'm doing alright", he picks up his bowl again shovelling noodles into his mouth waiting for himself to finish then he continues on "my dads doing my head in now though", that fact that he's really enjoying those noodles makes me smile,I make a mental note to remember that if he's ever here to make sure I have some.
"Why's that Darlin?", just watching him talking about what's bothering him and not being able to just be there for him, he told me about how he hadn't gone to school that day and his dad was just on his back about it really making him not want to go even more. Which I get because I hate it when you get told to do something repeatedly. "I'm sorry Darlin , is there anything I can do to help?"
"No love it's okay , just being here in your company is help enough", I know what it can be like and I understand where he's coming from, I just feel so calm when I'm around him , is that codependency already maybe , but I don't want to change it. "I've wanted to talk to you all day, and just hearing your voice has made the day so much better Matty honestly"
"We spoke earlier darlin , are you sure your okay?", I could get used to needy George so long as it doesn't mean he's upset, I adore this boy more than anything. After asking my question I get up from my seat stretching my legs and it relaxes me so much once all my muscles are stretched out. Picking up my books to return them to my rucksack and come back to the seat. I can feel his eyes on me the whole time which makes me smile.
He's smiling again and cheeks blushed because he knows I caught him "yeh love I'm alright , I...I don't ...I just wanted to hear your voice again....after earlier I suppose...I just feel a little needy right now is all"
"Can I talk to you about earlier actually?", I don't want him to think I wasn't enjoying it as much as he was because Jesus I was but there's a lot going on with me and I need to be sure that he understands "but don't worry about it, I just need to explain stuff."
"Sure thing love , what's up"
"Well , first off please don't think I wasn't as interested as you because , yes I did I want too like really wanted too but um...I was on all these meds for stuff and it just messed me up a little, just made it hard for anything to work...my labido has been kinda none existent for a while , but , but uh , man I don't know what I'm saying, I wanna try with you"
"I didn't think you weren't interested love , you had work and I was just feeling the way I was , don't feel like you have to be that way with me every-time I do", he's moving his hands around like people do when there having an awkward conversation "I'm interested in you but I'd never force sexual stuff on you"
"But..but I...I want too, like I really want too", I'm blushing due to the nature of the conversation and the honesty but also because of how precious his little face is.
"We'll we can , when your ready love, just let me know" , he's got the biggest smile plastered on his face and he looks amazing "you know ...you never have to explain anything to me love..I just wanna be around all the time"
I nod at him while I pick up my laptop and take it over to my bed yawning, I remove my shirt and slip into bed getting cosy. Today has been so busy my muscles are stiff and being in bed really helps me relax.
"Are you tired love ?, I can go if you'd like?" , he still looks wide awake and I swear he's got other things to be getting on with instead of looking after me right , but I just don't want him to go.
"I'm tired yeh but I'm not going to sleep yet, you can stay if you like , but if you've got other stuff to do, then your allowed to go"
"No , I don't want to go yet , I just don't want to keep you awake", he mirrors my actions gets himself into bed "we can watch something if you'd like"
"Oh, oh , oh, have you seen game of thrones , we can watch that if you want", I'm sure everyone has seen that show by now but I love it and the world it surrounds amazes me
"I have seen bits of it yeh , We can watch anything you like love, want me to screen share or can you do it ?", he looks so cute wrapped up in all those darn blankets he has on his bed and it makes me smile and totally forget to answer "Matty?"
"Huh!" , I release my gaze from his face for a second and try to gather what he had asked "oh sorry um yeh , no , um I'll do it", I pull my laptop closer to me to work the screen , while I'm typing away getting the show ready I can see him in the corner of my screen just staring. This in turn makes me blush and roll my eyes "your doing it again", with that I pull up Netflix and share it with him getting ready to play.
"I can't say I know what your talking about love" , we both settle down smiling like madmen and blushing as the title screen plays. The theme tunes send me into a complete other dimension I swear and I love it so much. It makes my smile so much bigger , which makes him giggle "someone's a little obsessed with this ain't they"
"Shush it's playing", he smiles at me again a big toothy grin this time and rolls his eyes. But does start paying attention to it. His eyes grow wide at a few point when something unexpected happens. I get overly excited at certain parts asking him if he understands what's going on which he replies with a nod as if to say he's heard me but isn't listening also he's engrossed and I swear it's amazing. We steal a few glances every now and then and blushing like teenage girls when we catch the other doing it. When the first one ends I ask if he wants to watch the next one which he gladly accepts, midway through the next one I see his eyes start to drop slightly as our mine "Darlin you still with me?"
"Mhm", he shakes his head a little and rubs his eyes trying to look more awake as he continues watching, his eyes still slowly dropping every few moments
"Darlin, we can watch this tommrow if you like, your tired ", I pause the episode and wait for him to reply as I yawn myself.
"I was enjoy it though" . He pours at me like a petulant child hoping I'd continue to play it but I can't keep him up and we both need sleep
"We can come back to it tommrow Darlin get your head down and we can get some sleep yeh?"
"Okay then if you say so". He moves his laptop to the other side of his bed so he can get properly comfortable in bed and lays down on his pillow his eyes shutting almost instantly "goodnight love" he blows me a kiss and turns over.
"Good night darlin" , I watch his back rise and fall for a little while hopefully he's asleep because I really need to talk to Ross. Once he's sure I'm asleep. I pick up my phone and send Ross a quick text to check if he's awake "DEFCON 5 ROSS , DEFCON 5". I move my laptop onto the other side of my bed also and sit up a little bit. A text from Ross doesn't take to long to come back "call me then dickhead"
I quickly pull him up on the offer and click the call button and bring the phone to my ear and start biting my nails while I wait for him to answer which doesn't take to long to come through.
"What's up ?" , he sounds a little groggy like I awoke him up.
"Did I wake you ?"
"No I'm just tired but I was on call with John and saw your message and thought I should call you", told you hes a fuckin gem "so what's up Matty?"
"I think I'm down bad Ross , like really down bad" , I continue bitting on my nails which makes the senatnce come out a little mumbled but he still catches onto what I'm saying.
"For George?", the fact that Ross remembers his name is a good start.
"Mhm" is all I can muster up the strength to say right now.
"What do you want me to do about it. I don't know him, Just talk to him Matty, he's seems like a good bloke"
"But how do I tell him"
"With your words Matty , you know use your voice box that thing that I've never known for you to close since I met you , you numpty" , I roll my eyes at this response because it's the most Ross response I have ever heard to a question
"But what do I say I meant , you dickead"
"Just tell him you like him or something I don't know"
"Much help Ross much help"
"Man honestly just go for it, if he makes you happy just let him know , I'm made up for you lad but you need to take the steps for yourself and I'm sure if he's a grand bloke he'll like you too why shouldn't he?"
"I don't know , he seems to like me but I'm scared it's to early"
"It might be , but all you can do is talk it through bro its can't go too wrong right ?"
"I'll try , anyway, I'll let you get back to your lover man ey , don't do anything I wouldn't yeh?" , I can physically feel him rolling his eyes at me.
"Ha-ha , very funny , but alright lad , I'll see you tommrow yeh?, and we can talk about it tommrow"
"Alright see ya"
"See you tommrow lad" , we both hand up and i through my phone into charge after I sent my alarm for school, with this I lay down properly and pull my blanket up to my chin to feel the warmth engulf me and I go back to watching George's back rise and fall . Which helps lul me to sleep. But what I didn't realise was while I was having Thai conversation George wasn't fully asleep yet and heard everything and was just laying there with the biggest grin on his face.
I think I’ve gone delulu man
Just found out some mad facts 😳
Also getting the middle one as a matching one with a friend of mine and I’m so excited ❤️
Bout to getting my silly little box tattoo in September
We’ll I only bought three what you looking at me for 😂😂😂
The masculine urge to call everyone Darlin is well high up in my priorities today
And it’s all Mattys fault
This is apparently what I do for people when I get drunk 😂
I was drinking with friends last night and I sobbed for like a solid ten minutes cuz one of em said they got to see the 75 during the brief inquiry/notes show before COVID 🥹🥹
I know I already posted this but I’ve just realised this it’s not very common thing but why are they ALL lefties 😂
This is so ADHD Matty Coded and I love it , everyone else just tryna work and Matty like 🕺🏻🕺🏻🕺🏻 if this is how school was for him I’d have loved to be in his class 😂😂
Telling my future children this is Matty Healy
#
Chapter 19
Word count / 2374
This chapter is nothing to shout home about I really hate it but I just wanted some communication with other characters in the story and some female characters other than Carly , hopefully the next few will be better , again I hope it’s okay
Sorry for typos
I HATE THIS CHAPTER HONESTLY
Matty's POV
"I bet you do"
That was the last thing I messaged George before I stepped into work, it wasn't to busy just yet and I saw my friend Vivian stood behind the counter wiping it down as I entered , I hung my jacket on the hook well Jamie's jacket because I still haven't given it back and make my way over to her "hey there gorgeous", I have nicknames for my friends it's nothing weird. I reach around her to clock myself in then take a second to look around. There's a few older couples in and a guy with dreadlocks sat in the corner he's a regular I see him every time I work so I think today might be a slow easy shift if it stays like this.
Vivian isn't doing much herself continuously cleaning the same spot of the counter "hey I heard if you clean hard enough you can scrub a hole through it" , she just glared at me through her eyelashes and I pull myself up to sit on the counter "what's up with ya?"
"Just Lukas , he's being a nightmare, just being super clingy and needy lately and it's doing my head in dude", she drops the cloth down onto the counter and sighs "like yeh sure he's my boyfriend but like I just need some space you know?". I've never liked Lukas he's always been really overbearing or the complete opposite and just not caring. He's very hot and cold with Viv, no one ever knows how he's going to be. He's a dick in all honesty
"Talk to him then Viv you know use your words man, or you could equally just tell him sling his hook, he's useless", I've had this conversation with Viv multiple times that he's useless but I guess when you love someone it's not that easy just to let them go.
"Did you speak to Lottie, like did you guys get anywhere?", I knew she'd try to change the subject because she doesn't like the idea of leaving him because they've been together on and off since they were 12 he all she's known really.
"Huh?", Lottie was one of the other girls that worked here we were really close and she kinda had a thing for me and she told me the other week that she'd like to try give us a go, we'd spoken a few times since but since I've started speaking to George I haven't spoke to her much. It's not really the best thing I've done, I kind of ghosted her because I wasn't feeling all great about it "oh um yeh, it didn't really go anywhere I wasn't feeling it", Im playing with my hands waiting for her to be annoyed at me, but she's not she just comes over standing next to me
"Did you even try Matt ?", I haven't really tried with anyone in quite sometime , George has been the first person really to make me even want to try, but I've just not felt it you know, I've had one night stands and been with people at parties but I can't say the last time I was really properly interested in anyone.
"Honestly Viv , no , I didn't really want too, like don't get me wrong she's lovely and she's absolutely gorgeous but I just couldn't bring myself to be interested", I know, If I really tried I could have been interested but being with anyone in the last few weeks maybe even months has just been right at the back of my mind. I want to let her know that I'm not totally isolating myself because she'll just get all big sistery on me "I am talking to someone though", a smile immediately finds its way to my lips even at the thought of George and I look at her "there wonderful"
She gets so giddy so fast clapping her hands and smiling "oh my god what's she like Matt", Vivian isn't the most feminine girl I know but she LOVES a bit of gossip and has always been interested in my love life. It's endearing really. "Tell me everything" , we both jump down from the counter and make ourselves coffees , the benefit of working here we get free coffee whenever we like. I scratch the back of my head a little contemplating weather or not I should tell her that it's actually a he not she. It think about it for a second then realise there's no need to hide.
"His name is George , and he just so ...I don't know so amazing" , Viv stops making her coffee just to look at me her mouth basically on the floor, and I'm just smiling at her with the biggest smile on my face
"No way , how have I never known this before, I need to know everything". Just as Viv asks me the store begins to get somewhat busy so we stop making out coffees and push the mugs to the back of the counters for later. Then we turn round to start serving customers. I think there may have been a kids club on tonight because there are a lot of families in just getting drinks and sandwiches, As it gets busier I can feel that all to familiar buzz run through me and my hands start to shake. A small child hands me the money that he'd like to pay with but instead of a note or the correct amount it's change but small change so I have to add it up to make sure it's correct but I count it three times and still feel like it's wrong. Looking over to Vivian for help I notice that she still has a line of people ordering this causes me to panic slightly. I count it one last time and put it through as what I believe it is and hand him the change. I try to busy myself with heating up paninis for a small table in the corner but with my hands shaking I accidentally burn myself on the grill "shitting hell", I slam the grill closed and turn back to Vivian who is now making coffees "I fuckin burned my hand again". I show her my shaking hand and the raging red rash that has already appeared on my hand.
"Matty Jesus , how do you manage that everytime, you gotta calm down lad your shaking". She takes my hand in hers and examines in "it should be okay just go and run it under some cold water and try to calm yourself down a little yeh!?" I nod as she lets me hand drop to my side, I scutter off to bathroom to rinse my hand wincing as the water connects with my hand and a small pain jolts through me . I take a breath through my teeth and force my hand to stay under the water. As I'm stood there rinsing my hand, I catch my reflection in the mirror not to dissimilar to how I've looked the past few days, I look totally done in , my cheeks are quite hollow , my eyes are a deep red and the bags around them are so black it looks like eye shadow and my cheek bones were perturbing a slight bit. I sigh to myself and roll my eyes , how did I let it get this bad I think to myself but than also realise that it's been easier for me doing everything the way I'm doing it now instead of forcing myself to be okay. I take another few seconds to myself and then turn off the tap and make my way back through to the front room. My manger now happens to be stood there god I hate this guy. He eyes me as I walk in. "Where have you been Matthew. You've been gone ten minutes right in the middle of a rush".
I immediately roll my eyes at him hopefully he doesn't notice "it's Matty, and I was rinsing my hand under water, I burnt my hand on the grill". I momentarily show him the burn and then shove my hands into my pockets, staring him down waiting for a reply from him
"Right , anyway back to work please". He walks back through to the office as I stand there awkwardly till he's gone then pull at face behind his back so that Viv can see
"He's a fuckin tool by the way", I get back to work, making coffees for a few more customers and serve them too. I'm really just willing my break to be soon , I've only been in and hour of my 4 and a half hours but I really can't be bothered with this right now. My head is still spinning from the rush ealier but I'm really willing it away and hoping It will just fuck off . After another half hour of this mundane job . My nicer shift manager comes over and tells me I can go for my break it's only 20 minute s but it's the best news of the shift.
I make my way out back and pull my phone out my pocket along with a cigarette and lighter. I light my cigarette and sit down on the steps of the back door and quickly snap George "hiya darlin , how are you doing without me?", I tear through my first cigarette quite quickly and immediately take another one out when George's reply comes through
It makes me smile and a shiver runs through me as I open it , he's just stood there hair wet and water droplet adorning his shoulders and chest "hiya love , I'm alright just out of the shower, how are you?", he can't be looking like this right now he's to gorgeous ,
"I've got a killer headache right now,burnt my hand , I'm a bit shaky and I feel like im on the verge of bloody murder but I'm okay", I feel the need to tell him I'm okay but I feel vulnerable about things and I send another quick message "can you tell me I'll be okay" , even asking that send another shiver down my spine because I hate that I already rely so much on George to keep me sane even after such a small period of time but really if he tells me I'll be okay then I'll believe him and it helps. That might not be the best thing for my sanity right now but it's what I need.
He replies not long after with a video message and I hear his soft deep tones coming through my speakers while he's laying there on his bed still top less "love trust me , If your really having a tough time, just know that I believe in you and I know your doing amazing , and you will be okay" , ahhh bless him he really is trying , I can't help but blush at the message I feel somewhat nervous even though he isn't here and my head starts to spin but for a completely different reason and I feel myself falling deeper into the whirlwind that's is George fuckin Daniel.
I send him a quick thank you and tell him I'll talk him later once I've finished and hopefully the rest of my shift goes by smoother. And at the I slide my phone back into my pocket and rise from the step dusting my clothes down before I step back into the store. Once I have come back in the store is a lot emptier and a lot calmer and I come bouncing over to Vivian with more of a spring in my step and jump back to sit up on the counter
The whole front counter area is back to normal, and all that's left to clean up is the kitchen itself and the dinning area, but I just know I'll get kitchen duty as we close in half an hour but we still have to clean for around 2 hours, Viv looks at me now noticing I'm alot calmer than I was. "Alright there stud".
"A little better yeh , it wasn't to busy while I was gone right ?". I hate leaving people on busy shifts but when I was feeling that uptight and needed a breather the break was the only option , "felt like I was about to fizz over for a second there but I'm doing a little better"
"What's up with you lately you've been really skittish Matt ?", I knew she'd ask after my little outburst but I really don't want to talk about it, not now at least because it will just set me off again and I want to stay calm and keep my composure for a little longer than 5 minutes . So with that I shrug , push myself back off the counter and go to starts cleaning tables
"I'm fine Viv", If I start cleaning tables and look like I'm busy out in the dining area I might not get shoved into the kitchen because that would just be the cherry on the cake that’s been this wank day , and I know I’d just walk out and lose yet another job.
The rest of the shift goes swimmingly , I do get a little shaky from time to time but I push it away and try to forget about it, it’s a struggle sometimes when I don’t know what causes it but I really have to do it, the last hour seems to tick away so slowly each minute feeling like a decade. Ten minutes before my shift ends I just give up with whatever I’m doing and try to procrastinate until my shift is over.
When my shift finally ends I clock out instantly, say goodbye to Viv and grab my jacket from the hook, stepping outside I light another cigarette and trudge the short distance home. I pull out my phone connecting my headphones and stick on some slayer and I see my last message from George “I hope you have an easier second half of your shift ay x” after that I reply with just a picture of myself smiling with a short message saying “yooo , finally finished ffs x”
JUST GOT A HAIRCUT AND ITS SIMILAR TO MY PROFILE PIC NOT EXACTLY THE SAME CUZ MY HAIR IS SHORTER BUT ARGHHH