Your Window to Inspiration: Seamlessly Browse Tumblr!
Dazai: I dare you to marry me.
Chuuya: No. I'm not falling for that idiot.
Dazai: Then I win.
Chuuya: What? No you don’t. I’ll marry the hell out of you. You’re officially my wife now. You can’t beat me like that.
Dazai: I want my vagina shaved ladies.
Chuuya: Then shave your vagina, Dazai.
Dazai, pulling out an engagement ring: Got it a week after we first met.
Chuuya:
Chuuya, also pulling out a ring: Got it yesterday.
Dazai: *on the phone* Hey, Chuuya~
Dazai: Do you know my blood type?
Chuuya: Of course, its AB.
Dazai: Oh, I guessed wrong. Excuse me, nurse-
Atsushi: Dazai, have you ever thought of getting married ?
Dazai: *gay panic* I'm pregnant!
ada: What?
Dazai: It's Chuuya's.
ada: WHAT?
*meanwhile in the pm*
Chuuya, feeling a disturbance in the force: He said something that will get me into trouble, I can feel it!
Dazai: Babe!
Chuuya: Don’t call me that!
Dazai: Chibi, honey, dear, love, sunshine, slug-
Chuuya: Dazai-
Dazai: Darling, hat rack, sweetheart, my God of fire-
Chuuya: Dazai no-
Dazai: Mi amore, the light of my life, my chihuahua, my doggie, my baby, angel, baby boy, baby girl-
Dazai: My petit mafia, shortie, sweetie-
Chuuya: Are you done?
Dazai: My beloved, the best executive, the anchor of my universe, the loml, my other half, my soulmate..
Chuuya:
Dazai: Ok, now I’m done.
Chuuya: Ok what did you want?
Dazai:
Dazai: Oh I forgot.
Dazai: I am 100% straight.
Ranpo: Kunikida teaching Atsushi martial arts.
Dazai: I am 90% straight.
Yosano: Dostoevsky in the Dead Apple movie.
Dazai: I am 70% straight.
Ranpo: Sigma wearing his high heels.
Dazai: I am 50% straight.
Atsushi: The Hunting Dog that arrested you.
Dazai: I am 40% straight.
Dazai: Still straight, still doing okay.
Ranpo: Chuuya-
Dazai: I am not straight.
Dazai: Hi, I’m bi. I’m attracted to women because they are incredible and I’m attracted to men because I love making bad choices.
Chuuya: Hey, if I ask you a boy question, will you promise not to be weird about it?
Kouyou: Come on, when have I ever been? Go on, tell me!
Chuuya: Well, Dazai--
Kouyou: You can do better!
Chuuya:
Chuuya: Shut up!
Dazai: Or what?
Chuuya, thinking what to say that could make Dazai shut up forever:
Chuuya: Or else I'll marry you!
Dazai: *malfunctions*
Dazai: We both look very handsome tonight!
Chuuya: You know, if you'd just said that I looked handsome, I would have said "so do you."
Dazai: No you wouldn't.
Chuuya:
Chuuya: Yeah, you're right.
Dazai: What the hell are you doing?
Chuuya, reading Dazai's diary: Sus, be quiet. It's an enemies to lovers very good book.
Dazai: It's not what you think.
Chuuya: Damn, so you're in love with somebody else named Chuuya? What were the odds?!
Chuuya: On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain?
Dazai: Pi.
Chuuya: Pi?
Dazai: Low level, but never ending.
Dazai: I need a top.
Ranpo: Chuuya is in the pm, but Atsushi can go get him for you.
Dazai, blushing: I meant for this food container!
Yosano: Ok, bottom...
Dazai: Yosano, please.
Yosano: ...drawer.
Dazai: I’m in love with you.
Chuuya, scoffing: Yeah, how many others have you said that to?
Dazai: Everyone.
Chuuya: …What?
Dazai: I told everyone I’m in love with you.