I Physically Make This Face

hi guys

tomorrow is the first day of pride month and if i dont look like this by tomorrow morning im gonna cook and eat every transphobe on the planet bc everything is their fault.

(source)

I’m losing my shit at this Mizumono reenactment.

you're missing pieces of yourself, Will be careful what you replace them with

stop making will stupid and incompetent in fics, specifically when he’s talking to hannibal. he may struggle with feeling totally confident, but not so much post fall. he may take a while to find his footing in their life together, but i doubt hannibal wouldn’t do the same in his own ways. he may gripe about hannibal’s extensive vocabulary, and desire to make conversations so meta, but he does enjoy it overall. not only that, but will reciprocates. will is smart, will matches hannibal in conversation. that’s quite literally one of the things hannibal adores about him, and one of the reasons will feels comfortable in hannibal’s presence because he’s not only seen, but heard, encouraged, and equal.

hannibal called francis a “shy boy” once and we got this angle

The calmest look that Will "I don’t like eye contact" Graham gave to Hannibal:

love this more than anything thank you

Will and Hidden Toxic Masculinity

The thing about rewatching Hannibal is that you never stop finding something new every single time. It could be your second rewatch or your 5th, but you always catch something new. In my case, it was the realization of hidden toxic masculinity in Will’s character.

When you think of Will Graham, you don’t immediately think “toxic masculinity”. Most people would think “no way” or if you go to the extreme, “Will? Never!”. I certainly didn’t catch it the first few times around. That is until I broke it down and realized it was hidden underneath all the social awkwardness and isolation. And probably all the gothic mumbo jumbo, yes.

In season one, we’re introduced to a highly intelligent and gifted, yet socially awkward and isolated Will Graham. He seems grumpy and rude, but overall harmless, but is he really? We already see some of Will’s manipulative side straight from the get go when Jack offers him a dream opportunity, but can’t pass the psychiatric evaluation to carry a firearm. Through Alana, he finds a way to try to wiggle his way out of it until he’s placed under Hannibal’s care and basically stomps his feet that he didn’t get what he wanted.

And there it is, the first sign. The sign of entitlement.

The thing about Will’s sense of entitlement is it’s something that evolves with time. In earlier parts of the story, we see it as almost bratty and then it turns into something more of possessive and feral. In most cases, it has to do with relationships, something he’s getting used to and also something he craves. A connection. There is nothing wrong with humans wanting connection with others as it’s natural. But in Will’s case, there’s many signs of crossing and even violating boundaries that makes it inappropriate and toxic. That is that he has a tendency to believe he is entitled to relationships he’s not necessarily entitled to have.

Whether it be with Alana, Abigail, or even Hannibal to a certain degree, you see Will getting offended or defensive when they set clear boundaries and/or have a life outside of him.

With Alana, he persistently pursued a romantic relationship with her and despite their mutual attraction to each other, she did set boundaries. Yet you see him continue to attempt to dismantle them and insist they can work out. Even after the first rejection, he drives miles in the snow to announce to Hannibal that he kissed her and that he’s always wanted to kiss her like she’s a sexual conquest. When she came to visit him later in Quantico, he keeps at it, hoping that she’ll come around and accept his advances and gets disappointed in her once again setting boundaries. When he got arrested and escaped, he practically barged into her home expecting her to automatically defend and believe him. And then again in jail, instead of considering her feelings, he said “Dodged a bullet romantically huh?”when Alana is feeling hurt about his supposed actions. After that, she hard rejected him and made it clear that they absolutely weren’t compatible. Yet when he was released after trying to kill Hannibal, he showed her he had no remorse for his actions and practically expected Alana to thank him for his perceived heroic act. No matter how you see it, these aren’t normal things for someone to do. It’s akin to a dog who kills a squirrel and brings it to his owner’s feet, expecting praise. It is disturbing.

With Abigail, regardless of Hannibal’s influence of nurturing paternal feelings towards Abigail, from the get go, Will sought out a special kind of relationship with her. Despite Abigail insisting him killing her father doesn’t make him her dad, Will continues to pursue her. He kept an idealized image of Abigail inside of his mind and became extremely possessive of that ideal. He claims he had bonded with Abigail, but reality says otherwise. Abigail was terrified of Will and believed he would sell her out even in the end. The only Will that Abigail knew is the version Hannibal had told her about. And he says he would be a good father.

When it comes to Hannibal, the first inclination of this entitlement more or less comes when Will comes to his house unannounced during a dinner party expecting them to be alone. Another time, you see him looking subtly offended that Hannibal would have company other than him and before their scheduled appointment. Although their relationship is slowly growing to one of codependency that Hannibal is nurturing, you still see Will expecting Hannibal to be available to him on his time and expectations. And this is season one people…

When it comes to relationships, you see a growing tendency of Will more or less using people to fulfill a need. This is something Hannibal told him directly when it came to him “choosing” his new family. Whether that be normalcy, acceptance, or filling his mind with palatable fantasies, it isn’t a normal or acceptable type of behavior. A relationship of any kind is a two way conversation and more often than not, you see Will disregarding the conversation and turning it into a monologue. He expects others to cater to adjust to him and his wants. It isn’t fair. But inequity is a large part of Will’s character even till the end.

It isn’t until Mizumono and Primavera that he gets a massive wake up call that he realizes, yes, he is toxic and that his toxicity has heavily harmed others including Hannibal.

Usually this is where someone would realize “Wow, I’m such an asshole” and do some self reflection and maybe try to do better…but this is gothic romance. We all know how these stories work when it comes to that. It’s a winding rollercoaster ride.

i want to be him so bad who the fuck is will graham

insanely good

Dissecting a surgeon: The anatomy of Hannibal Lecter

Hannibal Lecter isn’t just one man. I like to think of him exactly the way he displayed Beverly Katz: He’s layered, more vulnerable and personal with each part. The trick to understanding Hannibal is getting to know all those layers separately, then knowing which one is appearing on the screen. In the show Will states how Hannibal follows different trains of thought at once, but I believe he also wears different skins that somehow all belong to him. Like a Matryoshka doll. He has countless different faces that he switches around daily, even hourly. Some are stored in dusty attics in his mind, others are next to his door to pick up before he leaves the house first thing in the morning. I probably don’t even get near knowing all of them, let alone fully understand all of them. But the trick is to know how to distinguish them and which are important. Here’s my attempt at a dissection of his psyche.

At first there is, obviously, his Person suit.

The person suit is Hannibal’s social persona. His public image and the almost God-like reputation he’s carefully built around himself over the years. It’s the personality meant to impress and express. For friends and acquaintances and maybe even strangers. The Person suit was an unbreakable shield before his identity as killer was made public. The Person suit exists in three shapes: The Host, The Professor and The Artist. Here’s what they represent.

The Host is somewhat of a Narcissus-like figure. Self possessed, but in a way that makes people adore him because it appears rather as self awareness when it comes to his talents and qualities than arrogance. The host is charming, confident, entertaining and gifted. He’s an amazing cook and an amazing character to have attending your party. He’s the kind of man you compare yourself to when you realise you’re failing at life. The same goes for the Professor. Intelligent, well-spoken, a respected and admired name in his field. The Artist is a bit more personal, and a little more reserved for friends. The Artist is emotional and very sensitive. To the arts, obviously. The artist is enthusiastic despite his calm and sophisticated nature. He picks up a pencil and creates a masterpiece, the Artist attends the opera and is the one to start a standing ovation. The Artist cries when he reads a poem and composes his own music on obscure instruments he happens to own. He’s in love with beauty, always reaching for it. And he believes, or knows, that he himself is beautiful. The entirety of Hannibal’s person suit is deeply satisfied with himself, because he represents an image of perfection. An ideal. Almost like a god. Powerful, multidimensional, but alone.

Second, Dr Lecter.

Dr Lecter is astute, cold, impersonal and mysterious. He’s well known for excelling in his profession, but he’s also a mystery and breaks borders others in his field shy away from. He’s admired, but he will always remain distant. Out of reach. He crawls into your head like a parasyte, but you’ll never get into his. He makes most feel like they are far beneath him and matching his level seems like the highest order there is. He likes to stand above his patients. To give them advice while at the same time managing to have a certain control over them and the unstable balance that will always favour him. Dr Lecter has an incredibly large ego, but he manages to hide it well. There’s no saying he’s morally corrupt or not. He doesn’t balance on the line of morality. He floats above it. 

Then there’s the Chesapeake Ripper.

Playful, clever, incredibly dangerous. Hannibal isn’t a psychopath, but the Ripper is. He has no feelings for remorse, guilt or pity. He’s a beast of a man with a set of very skilled hands and a brain. He believes in no one but himself and finds his way out of every situation. He’s also annoyingly flirtatious. A flatterer, almost. A shadow in an open field, that’s what he is. Standing out yet still invisible. Something ungraspable. Its own master. There’s no controlling the Ripper. You never really catch him. He’s witty and slippery. A snake in the tall grass.

For Will, and only for Will, there’s an alter ego connected to the Ripper. The wendigo. The monster. Which is soulless. A manifestation of corruption turned into something black and rotten. The Wendigo is the darkest side of Hannibal, because the Wendigo has no emotions. He’s a puppet. The shadow of a man from the deepest pits of Hell. For everyone except Will, however, The Wendigo is the enemy. The darkness that quite literally beams out of the killer and takes shape because he can’t hold it all in. An omen of misfortune, for Will a warning for approaching darkness in the worst parts of himself like poisonous vines. It’s what’s formed inside of him after so many years of doing unspeakable things and it’s something only Will (as far as we know) can visually see.

When we go deeper, there’s Count Lecter, who we don’t really get to know at all. Count Lecter’s whole personality is hidden behind the letters of his name. Proud, but extinguished. Once very powerful, but now just a glorious piece of history. A textbook reputation. Count Lecter belongs to the castles that are his property in Lithuania. Count Lecter is a name that belongs in the books. Hannibal probably feels a connection to him, but he’s like the promise made to him in his childhood that turned out to be a lot less fun than he expected. A title given to him by birth that now holds barely any meaning anymore except for his wealth and social status. Count Lecter is not a breathing part of him, but rather a thing he could have been.

Now there’s an interesting one. We know Mads often speaks of Hannibal as a fallen angel. A Lucifer inspired figure. This part of Hannibal is something more Devil-like. It’s the darker and more personal companion of his Person Suit charms. It’s less pretending, more savage. A deeply religious individual. He believes in God and absolutely despises him. He has dealt with betrayal. With pain and burden and it made him cruel. This part of him is a manifestation of his lust, his greed and his gluttony all together. That fallen angel is bitter in his core, but sly and challenging, too. He doesn’t try to hide his darkest desires, he just knows how to warp his words just so that only those who truly understand him know what he means. The fallen angel is also desperate for someone to understand his wrath and hold him company. He saw that person in Will. 

At last, obviously, there’s Hannibal.

Hannibal, who is vulnerable and devoted and naked under Will's eyes. Who is, I believe, the only part of him capable of love and it’s the part that wrecks him and the perfect shield of costumes he made for himself. Hannibal is the tears that come from true emotion instead of art. His ugly tears. Hannibal bears his wounds, his scars. Hannibal holds his child self hostage inside of him. Hannibal is the only one of them that has a heart, and it’s very teary and fragile and sensitive and it’s hurt so easily. Hannibal is the quivering hands with which he held the knife the night he stabbed Will and killed Abigail. Hannibal is his ritual of shattering teacups hoping they will restore themselves to prove that his own mistakes and wrongdoings can be fixed. Hannibal is the man who surrendered himself to the police, who carried Will home for miles and miles in the snow. Hannibal is who Will keeps chasing. Hannibal is the humanity he still carries within himself. The flesh and blood. The fool.

I think that understanding all these parts separately makes it easier to figure him out as a person. Either way, let me know if there’s anything I missed. Thank you for reading

Thinking about characters who never say "I love you."

Thinking about relationships that revolve around the intimacy of knowing and being known. Of understanding someone so completely and the terror of realising that they also understand you.

Thinking about love. The kind that lives in actions and silences and companionship shared between people who did not know before that comfort could look like this.

Thinking about characters who can't meet their own eyes in the mirror. Who look at their partner like the ocean looks at the sky. Who don't see their partner looking back.

Thinking about people who fear being abandoned. Who seek freedom in separation yet always find peace in returning to each other.

Thinking about bonds that transcend labels because some words don't need to be said in order to be heard.

Thinking about characters who never say "I love you" but instead say, "I see you, and I'm still here."