Okay So I Know The Thing That Riz Is Disputing Here Is That He's Not A Child (well He Is Like 13 But

adaine punching her dad to death "guess what bitch I'm strong now" adaine punching her dad to death "you never have to be afraid of being weak again" adaine punching her dad to death "your father hurt you and he hurt your sister and no matter what anybody fucking thinks about it guess what he never gets to hurt anybody ever again" adaine punching her dad to death ADAINE PUNCHING HER DAD TO DEATH

me planning my adaine fic : so ik I said my favourite thing about adaine is her rage, her refusal to become the person her parents want her to be, her constant biting back and how brave it is, but like what if I took it away in the interest of angst and self-projection. I'll give it back I swear

soo just listened to the battle of twelve brooks and I have too many thought and not enough word and oh my fucking god

I have like fifty posts (all unintelligible) about how adaine abernant makes me feel sat in my drafts and I also just spontaneously burst into tears earlier thinking about how I wish I could have preserved my rage like this silly little fictional character managed to. I want to be angry like adaine and bitter like adaine and mean like adaine and I want to punch my dad so hard he dies in a forest made of my worst nightmares and I wish I was angry at people other than myself right now

I also think about the fact riz carried around baron in his briefcase for an entire year a lot.

it feels a lot like a queer (specifically ace for me) denial that I'm intimately familiar with. you know you don't want it but you keep the idea of the life you're supposed to have, the partner you're supposed to want, in your back pocket to fall back on if being different gets too scary, so if all your friends find people who matter more to them and leave you might have someone too. you know it feels scary and stifling and wrong but you keep it there in the bottom of your briefcase just in case, just in case. you can't let it go and you can't let the shame that goes with it go because that would mean being alone, right?

anyway I'm in a perpetual romantic attraction crisis (am I demiromantic or is that just internalised aphobia rearing its ugly head again) and riz gukgak is a mood

i think about the fact riz carried around baron in his breifcase for an entire year a lot. btw.

like yeah you defeated him in the nightmare forest and he isn't a threat now or whatever but. he's there. you know he is. and you carry that invisible weight of the fear that one day all your friends will move on and you will die alone for a year. for more than a year.

and you see it coming true. your plan to keep all your friends together crumbles between your fingers and you don't know what to do.

then it comes back in a massive moment, there is no shoving the monster under the bed anymore. you cannot shy away from mirrors and cover your ears and act like it was never there to begin with. it is too large and you have ignored it for far too long. you must face it.

jokes on the homophobic trad Christian grandmas out there

your arts of knitting, crocheting, sewing, embroidery, and all fiber arts are being claimed by the lgbtq community

doing nanowrimo for the first time this november and it's actually scary how do people do this

idk about anyone else but I get so damn excited when closed captions are referenced or like there's easter eggs in the captions like it's the best thing I'm so tired of missing stuff because the captions are bad so when this happens it's great

im here because of ur trans bad kids post i feel like kristen is transfem (which sort of doesnt work with the story but its a headcanon so. shhh) and realized later in life that you can be nonbinary and trans and probably uses any pronouns (sending an ask because i dont want my mutuals to know im into d20. ok thats all bye :3) (extra note we have the same pronouns! which i think is cool)

the amount of respect I have for trans headcanons that don't make sense in the story but just Feel Right ™️ is truly unbridled. transfem kristen is so good yes, I love the idea that helio expected his chosen one to be a dudebro fratboy and he instead got a chaos gnc lesbian.

also xe/they pronouns are objectively the best ones I don't make the rules

evan "what if I was bright green" kelmp is an autistic mood