miracleracoon
Just a racoon
71 posts
Latest Posts by miracleracoon
Maomao after being thrown into that snake torture pit lmao
on watching a parent age
i saw somebody say “what if you’re gone and i haven’t become anything yet” and basically that broke me on a random thursday evening
PnF Spirit Week 2: June 1st - Friend group without the Flynn-Fletchers
STOP. moment of gratitude for those precious times of breathing from your nostrils when you don't have a stuffy nose
when I was a little kid at some point I got upset with my parents because I didn't have a crucifix in my bedroom and they did- I was like why do YOU get to be safe from vampires??? you're okay with me getting my blood sucked???? so we took a little trip to the catholic store but the one closest to us was run by a group of nuns that had been moved here from romania. I got a little baby pink cross and this sweet old nun was like 'aww, is this a baptism gift?' and I was like no. I need to be protected from vampires. and she immediately got SO serious and was like 'this is the best one we've got, you'll definitely be safe' and since she was literally from vampire land I was convinced she was like, van helsing. like the whole time my parents had been laughing about how cute my fear was but she literally Knew dracula and was taking my concerns seriously I held this over my parents for so long lmfao
me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit
mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters
me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU
when she says she doesn’t send nudes
truly some people have no genre savviness whatsoever. A girl came back from the dead the other day and fresh out of the grave she laughed and laughed and lay down on the grass nearby to watch the sky, dirt still under her nails. I asked her if she’s sad about anything and she asked me why she should be. I asked her if she’s perhaps worried she’s a shadow of who she used to be and she said that if she is a shadow she is a joyous one, and anyway whoever she was she is her, now, and that’s enough. I inquired about revenge, about unfinished business, about what had filled her with the incessant need to claw her way out from beneath but she just said she’s here to live. I told her about ghosts, about zombies, tried to explain to her how her options lie between horror and tragedy but she just said if those are the stories meant for her then she’ll make another one. I said “isn’t it terribly lonely how in your triumph over death nobody was here to greet you?” and she just looked at me funny and said “what do you mean? The whole world was here, waiting”. Some people, I tell you.
x
no really, i must go. bye now!
(original under the cut)
SISYPHUS GETS A 9 TO 5
[spoilers for all of severance season 1. words by northernlion, brain worms by me]
calm down guys, it's only the 8th
A horror comedy concept: Two characters, who are complete strangers to each other, who both have their own distinct narrative device, bump into each other and get theirs switched up. One of them has a laugh track, and the other one has a classical greek chorus.
So now they must find each other again, with no idea how, to switch back and be free of this horrid unfamiliar torment they have been subjected to.
Sometimes I hyperfocus so hard on something, I forget I’m a person until someone interacts with me. I feel like some wild animal seeing a human being for the first time. I’m like “oh yeah I’m supposed to speak and stuff”
we usually think of mood as a scale from 1-5, but there's actually a negative scale too, where the frown turns back into a smile, but just a little insane !
Things are shit right now. Have a picture of my dog Baxter Louis and his goofy expression. My favorite picture of him.
Woke up to him staring at me like this and needed a pic of it.
Anyway. Life sucks, but there are little things in life that will make you smile and make life bearable. Find your little light and keep it safe.
obsessed with this genre of images
Impeccable timing posting this more than a month after Halloween 🙃
A short comic I made in 2022 for a Horror Anthology.
CAUSE EVERY TIME WE TOUCH I GET THIS FEELING
EVERY TIME WE KISS I SWEAR I COULD FLY
CAN’T U FEEL MY HEART BEAT FAST, I WANT THIS TO LAST
NEED YOU BY MY SIDE
Reading a Terry Pratchett book is literally just: Here's a funny little joke Here's something that you can tell is a joke but don't get and will only figure out five years later Here's a surprisingly cool fantasy concept Here's a unique and well written simile Here's a lil guy Here's something that has aged depressingly well into the modern day Here's something that has aged remarkably queer into the modern day Here's a character that you can barely understand what he's saying Here is the most terrifying and deeply disturbing concept you have ever heard, casually mentioned Here is the dumbest fucking pun you've ever heard but in the best way Here is a quote so profound that it makes you view morality and the world in a different way Here is a plot twist that you can't tell if it's genius or stupid Congratulations! You've finished the book! It has fundamentally changed you as a person and you will never be the same!
don’t invite me unless these are the plans
went to the pub for a drink on my first real day off in over a week and watched the girl behind the bar drop the entire cash drawer on the floor in the middle of the rush and then just stare at it at her feet for like a solid two minutes
My current favourite tiktok trend is the one where people wrap presents to look like something they're not and some people get ridiculous with it
Like:
✨The dedication ✨