I Thought It Was Really Cute, So I Drew It😉

[©Mark Sutton]

f1 grid | juno positions

୨ৎ : featuring : all drivers on the grid ୨ৎ : synopsis (requested by anon) : every driver and which juno position from sabrina carpenter's tour suits them >.>

୨ৎ : genre : suggestive... kinda smutty idk (i don't really write smut anymore so this is a rare one...) obv some are the same positions.. i couldn't sit through an 8 minute video of all the juno positions LMFAO ୨ৎ : tws : suggestive ୨ৎ : word count : 597

୨ৎ masterlist ୨ৎ

ᡣ𐭩 a/n : i couldn't help but post this so soon LMFAO it was such a fun request i couldn't leave it sitting there waiting to be queued ... too good ty anon <3

ʚ・red bull

max verstappen - standing doggy no time for nonsense, just efficient execution. aggressive, locked-in, and somehow still makes you feel completely taken care of. terrifyingly good at everything, including this.

yuki tsunoda - cowgirl tiny menace. gives full chaos and control. jokes around, then ruins you. he’s in charge, not you. don’t be fooled by the baby face.

ʚ・mercedes

george russell - legs up missionary textbook performance, but with precision and tenderness. prepped for this moment like it was a championship strategy. probably asks if you’re comfortable mid-way through.

kimi antonelli - bridge young but scarily talented. pulls it off like it’s nothing and casually shrugs after. doesn’t even realize how hot he looks doing it.

ʚ・ferrari

charles leclerc - reverse cowgirl quiet in interviews, dramatic on the radio. gives you “hopeless romantic who pretends not to care” energy. lets you take the lead but still makes it cinematic somehow.

lewis hamilton - spooning luxury. candles. playlist curated to the vibe. everything is intentional, soft, and meaningful. says “i got you” and means it.

ʚ・mclaren

lando norris - ballet dancer starts off laughing, then surprises you with full performance energy. twirls you around like it’s a rom-com, then bites your neck for fun.

oscar piastri - tucked missionary he’s calm, quiet, and absolutely calculated. very into the technical details. doesn’t make a fuss but has you clutching the sheets like ??? how???

ʚ・aston martin

fernando alonso - squatting cowgirl age is just a number. balances like a yoga master, keeps eye contact, and somehow turns it into a motivational speech halfway through.

lance stroll - one-leg-up missionary chill, not flashy, but shockingly good at this exact position. leans into it casually. acts like it’s nothing but has you seeing stars.

ʚ・williams

alex albon - kneeling oral sweetest boy alive. loves making you happy more than anything. says “tell me what you like” with the softest voice. gold star giver.

carlos sainz - doggy classic. passionate. in control. the man thrives under pressure and it shows. focused, intense, and somehow turns this into a performance worthy of applause. probably whispers something in spanish that short-circuits your brain. makes you feel like it was your idea the whole time.

ʚ・haas

ollie bearman - one-leg spoon baby boy energy. tries his best. a little shy but committed. accidentally makes it romantic. 10/10 would comfort you with snacks after.

esteban ocon - missionary starts off shy, but the moment kicks in and suddenly it’s like he’s been rehearsing this in the mirror. soft-spoken, maybe even a little awkward beforehand, but he’s determined to prove himself. will absolutely debrief the whole experience afterward like it's a post-race interview.

ʚ・racing bulls

liam lawson - splits unsuspecting menace. looks like he’d hesitate, then surprises you with flexibility and full commitment. asks afterward if he did good. he did.

isack hadjar - the arch absolutely shows off. confident, slightly cocky, but backs it up. makes eye contact while doing it and smirks when you blush.

ʚ・alpine

pierre gasly - reverse cowgirl he’s not doing the work — you are. but he’s there for the view, hands behind his head, sunglasses still on indoors. makes smug comments the entire time like, “yeah, just like that.” fully vibing while somehow still running the show. would wink at you mid-movement and say something unhinged in french.

jack doohan - cowgirl confident in theory, flustered in practice. lets you take the lead but lowkey panics when you actually do. tries to act chill but you can literally feel his heart pounding through his chest. afterward, he’s all pink-cheeked and smiley, like “that was great… did I do okay?” you reassure him. he did amazing.

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I think everyone severely underestimates how much iron women need compared to men. Lets put things in context first: beef contains about 1-3mg of iron per 100g/3.5oz, depending on the cut.

men and women are somewhat similar in iron demands up until 14 and then a huge change at 19 onwards. 19 year old+ men need around 8mg of iron a day. so like. a single large, or two small steaks. of course you get iron from things other than beef, and they'll likely get enough on any normal daily diet.

women need 18mg of iron a day and TWENTY SEVEN when pregnant. that's over TWICE the male requirement for your entire life and over three times when pregnant. THATS A LOT?? look at ur own diet for a minute and i promise you, unless ur going crazy on oats and chickpeas or something, you are NOT getting enough iron. probably not even close.

and I'm mind-blown by this because somehow, culturally, meat/red meat seems to be a more stereotypically masculine thing. when eating out, women get a salad and men get a burger or a steak. you google "person eating steak" and vast majority of results are men - when there are women, they've also got a cute little salad on the side, meanwhile men tend to have plates full of meat. (seriously. go google this. it's crazy)

WOMEN: YOU NEED TO EAT TWICE AS MUCH IRON-DENSE FOODS THAN UR BROTHER, UR DAD, UR HUSBAND ETC. MORE THAN TWICE AS MUCH. NO WONDER YOU FEEL TIRED AND WEAK ALL THE TIME.

By the way, for anyone wondering, chicken hearts contain about 9mg/100g and don't taste that bad. it just tastes like chicken. i know this sounds so gross but i pan fry around 500g, pop it in the fridge and eat them cold throughout the day, split it across 3-4 days (don't eat past 3 days refrigeration). i promise its not that bad. (they're SO cheap btw. by far cheapest meat on the market, let alone meat with high iron. i get those 500g batches for THREE DOLLARS meanwhile a 200g steak is $15+ and doesn't even cover the iron i need). chicken liver is also really good and cheap but i cant vouch for the taste.

any man who is offended or upset by an indication that you don’t automatically trust him is ABSOLUTELY planning to hurt or take advantage of you. literally 100% of the time.

The poses I pull out after begging my friend to take a picture of me:

"I'm excited. I generally love the rain. It's gonna be tricky, but, usually when you have a qualifying like I just had, you hope for the rain. So, I hope that it stays."

the goodest boy

of course, carlos manages to post a gayer shot than anyone has posted on this hell site

the crowd singing "DU DU DU DU Max Verstappen" during the podium is so iconic

Sir Lewis Hamilton with Niki Lauda and Toto Wolff after winning his 4th championship (2017)