141 Showers 🚿🫧

I'm not gonna be in the Call Of Duty fandom anymore, well, the MW fandom. at least not fully, and I will explain, but first and foremost I want to clarify: I'm NOT leaving tumblr entirely & I'm NOT gonna back down either from my previous statements. So, allow me to begin as to why I'm making this decision.

The rape, incest, pedo and animal abuse pornography

Quite frankly, as someone who has been through rape and child sexual abuse, I find it ABHORRENT that anyone would ever look at such abuses and decide to fetishise, romanticise and glorify these things. I do not care nor want to know your "justifications" because frankly there aren't any. As a survivor, I am aware that the fandom is malicious and nasty towards people like me; I am aware that you people willingly and HAPPILY engage with such harmful, disgusting material. Quite honestly, I could not name a space more dedicated to the harassment, malicious treatment and utterly disgusting behaviour towards these topics and the people who openly disagree with them.

The racism

Before you tell me "Call Of Duty fans have always been racist", I am aware of that. But I'm talking specifically about the niche fandom (because it is niche). The fandom treats Black and Brown characters utterly abhorrently; from turning Gaz into a stereotype through to fetishising Farah and everything in between, the fandom's racism is progressively getting WORSE - and then x reader writers (who are predominantly white) only add to that by purposefully and willfully excluding Black and Brown people from fandom altogether. The racism within this space makes it clear that anybody who is NOT white is NOT welcome, and frankly, I do not wish to be associated with such disgusting people. To treat Black people as tokens, to purposefully KICK people of colour out of fandom - it's disgraceful and I hope that everybody is ashamed of themselves.

The ableism and saneism

The Call Of Duty fandom is NOT a safe place for anyone who has a psychotic, schizospec, dissociative or personality disorder. Plain and simple. From the colloquial usage of mental health terms such as "delusional", through to the "jokes" which are made to trigger people with such disorders (e.g. "in your walls"), and to the casual usage of anti-psychotic slurs like "psycho" and "schizo", it's obvious to anyone with just one quick look that this fandom sees people with such disorders as either their punching bags, their "memes" or worse: not human at all. And this also translates to fanworks, as quite honestly, I'm tired of seeing the same treatment directed towards characters like Nikto, because it shows that you people do not care about us at all. We aren't human to you, and we never will be. We are not even worth CONSIDERING when it comes to offensive language - it's degrading, it's dehumanising and it's exhausting to have to constantly walk away from fanworks that are so obviously made with malicious intent.

The homophobia

I am a bisexual/pansexual/omnisexual/queer/whatever you wanna call it man, and the amount of homophobia in the Call Of Duty fandom is disgusting. No, bisexual men AREN'T your "uwu bby boy so soft such a bottom bitch!!". You perpetuating homophobic stereotypes for the sake of a ship is utterly and completely and truly vile. How dare you claim to support LGBTQIA+/queer people when you KNOWINGLY perpetuate these stereotypes? When you KNOWINGLY engage in homophobic behaviour. You are scum.

The antisemitism and islamophobia

This is a touchy subject for non-religious folk, but I really wish you lot would all leave religious people alone. It takes you two seconds to look up what Muslims and Jews believe in and act accordingly. It takes you two seconds to NOT open your mouth when Muslims and Jews talk about their headcanons of characters being religious - because what gives you the right? Why do you feel so comfortable to shut down religious people's headcanons of characters? "Oh, he can't be Jewish because he's English", English Jews exist. "Oh, he can't be Muslim because he's Scottish", Scottish Muslims exist. These people exist in real life, and you saying that a character CANNOT be a Muslim or a Jew because of where they come from is little more than antisemitism and Islamophobia. Do better.

The apathy

When I say "the apathy", I mean exactly that. It is exhausting having to call out these horrid things time and time again and then see people WILLINGLY ignoring blatant bigotry by brushing it off and saying "I don't want to get involved in drama", as if somebody being a bigot is akin to a quarrel between two friends, or a disagreement between two people. If you aren't willing to address genuine harm ONLINE, then I'm sorry, but I doubt you would do anything OFFLINE either. If you're boiling things that actually harm people down to "drama", then I'm sorry, but you can't expect to be considered a safe person for people to be open with and to be honest with when it comes to their mental health or to their triggers. It's that simple. Your apathy towards your fellow man is blatant, and I cannot in good conscience continue to rub shoulders with such people.

Going forward

I'm not going to be engaging with MOST of the content within the Call Of Duty fandom - whether that's edits, fanfic, fanart, etc. I'm not. I've got a few mutuals who I've decided I WILL continue reading from or looking at their art or whatever, but for the most part, I'm not going to be active within the Call Of Duty fandom. I will continue writing for SOME of the characters, but my list of who I write for will be drastically reduced to just a few select characters. If somebody asks me "hey, is X thing saneist?" then of course I'll answer. If somebody points out to me that I took a request from someone who follows a rape pornographer, then I will delete that request and that fanfic entirely. I will still be happy to talk about the characters & games, but it will only be WHEN ASKED, and I will continue to use my DNI (although I'm going to change it a little so that the rape porn viewers/readers know I don't want them near me).

Of course, if anyone requires further clarification on anything I said, I'll be happy to answer and explain as best as I can! And if anyone feels emboldened by this post to come forward and share their own experiences with such things, then I will happily read through that, too! This post is 100% okay to reblog, and if anyone wishes to reblog it and go "This is also why I left the fandom", then I will happily hear you out. What I will NOT hear out, however, is any justification or defence of any of the harmful behaviours I have mentioned - I do not wish to hear it. Pack it in, and take it to 4Chan where you belong.

I need you all to see what my deranged doodles of mirage consist of every time i just try to sketch him. it always devolves into a pure chaos.

rewatching captain america brave new world for the first time since theaters and every few scenes i just have to stop and be like “this. this is a good movie whether people want to admit it or not.”

HE KEEPS DOING IT. I can't screenshot cause laptop is trash. I'm on the verge of tears each time it happens because he does it just outside my peripherals. Was playing till like 1 am last night trying so hard to be quiet.

So I'm playing new vegas for the first time (technically second) but I'm in freeside doing the door guard for the van graffs and I turn to look at simon...only to see Arcade making direct eye contact with Simon staring him down.

I really dig Sam’s style because he is a fundamentally good character with a fighting style oriented to subdue and neutralize instead of harm (and you have to be a hell of a good fighter to do what he does without a serum) but the second his life is getting threatened he goes full Sidney Prescott and hits with whatever is around him and pretty ruthless at that

Something that i adored about CABNW is the fact he's not enhanced, he's just that good. He's that talented, he's that strong, he's that resourceful. I cannot stress this enough how genuinely talented Sam Wilson has to be to be Captain America and as well not being a super soldier. He's surrounded by all theses enhanced people that are in every aspect of the word "super", and at the end of the day he's still just a normal human being. He's smart incredibly so, he's very resourceful an example; the scene in CABNW where he's using a car battery to make the smoke. He has some balls in CAWS when he threatens a hydra pawn in broad daylight with some sunglasses and a drink, and he's smug about it. His overall character having a solid fucking personality and being given so much room to grow maw i love him.

"You're desperate without your gear".

"Nope just a little meaner".

Being a system is sometimes being called an inconsistent asshole who can't commit for his life. When in reality your 8 guys in one body DESPERATELY trying to function and everyone keeps forgetting what they said they'd do....

god i fucking love trans men like the act of making yourself a man is so breathtakingly beautiful the ability to build yourself up brick by brick to keep pushing forward through the mire that tries to hold you back to be able to hold your breath forever while the whole world tries to drown you like truly every trans man reading this you are the strongest bravest cleverest most enduring people i know i love you forever

see i don't post to often. i go into brief pauses and then upload a bunch of shit i've done. and this just in its my reimagining of a really old meme i made and cannot find anymore

“Oh my god. You’re such a Sam glazer”

“You glaze Sam too much”

Yes.

Yes, I do. Fuck any of you who think I don’t have EVERY right to glaze him, because he is such an amazing character, he’s cool, he’s fair, he’s funny, he’s a GREAT FUCKING CAPTAIN AMERICA and I am willing to throw hands with ANYONE who’s like:

“But John Walker-“

“John Walker got better-“

Idgaf??? Was he not made out to be a white supremacist and a nationalist in TFAWTS??? Who got off mostly Scot free?? (Might be wrong, still haven’t finished my rewatch of TFATWS) I don’t fucking like the guy, especially cause of the way he treats Sam (implicitly)