080909

to do:

get job...🥲

when i've secured a job:

confirm salary

organise a flat/1 bed house that will allow me to have a cat

find a local cat shelter

contact current employers about the year break

do anytime:

buy a parcel so i can mail my used binder to spectrum

peruse the local gay bar scene

make progress on my cosplay sewing before summer comes around - see if painting the stripes on is possible

It is crucial for deeper level recovery that we learn that feelings of fear, shame and guilt are sometimes signs that we have said or done the right thing. They are emotional flashbacks to how we were traumatized for trying to claim normal human privileges.

As our recovery progresses, we need to learn to endure these feelings. Reinterpreting the deeper meaning of these feelings is key to accomplishing this. Typically this involves epiphanies like the following. “I feel afraid now, but I am not in danger like I was as a child.” “I feel guilty not because I am guilty, but because I was intimidated into feeling guilty for expressing my opinions, my needs and my preferences.” “I feel shame because my parents rained disgust on me for being me. I say no to these toxic parental curses, and I am proud and right to see how they tried to murder my soul. I give them their shame back as disgust- the disgust any healthy adult feels when he sees a parent bullying a child with contempt, or when he sees a parent heartlessly ignoring a suffering child.”

-Pete Walker- Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving: A Guide and Map For Recovering From Childhood Trauma (2013)

✧*｡ (๑ super sonico stamps! ๑) ✧*｡

.・꩜˚₊‧⁺⋆ f2u w credit. ♡

assorted blinkies :>

x

All I ever wanted was to experience what its like to feel safe with someone.

my regression room 🧸🌸💓

s*xual blogs fuck off <3

— Jennifer Niven, All The Bright Places